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Constant pain, I want to die.

Fri Jun 02, 2017 4:29 am by Meggiemay

I posted on here a few years ago but my symptoms went away with the inflammation. I didn't get so lucky this time.

For over three months, i've had terrible rawness, burning, soreness in the urethral/vestibule area and pressure/hypersensitivity in the clitoral area. I've also had some lower abdominal pressure and burning on my butt. I can barely walk! My gyno hasn't been much help. I'm on …

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Clitoris Issues

Tue Apr 28, 2015 8:17 pm by January

I am going crazyyy trying to figure out what's wrong. Please does anyone else have an issue similar to mine? I'm only 22. So, basically when my clit is lightly rubbed, there is no feeling. However, when rubbed vigorously and directly, the burning and tingling sensations shoot down my legs and feet as if coming to the end of an orgasm but with no good feeling leading up. It's so strange. What …

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New member

Sat Mar 18, 2017 7:37 pm by Lisa1627

Hi ladies. I am new to the forum. I have had what I think is vulvodynia caused from hsv 2. So not only do I have the burning vag but the constant feeling of being contagious. I can honestly say that I hate my life and myself right now. There are days when I think I would rather be dead. I tried the amitryptline and it helped but if it's only making my brain think I don't have pain then it's …

Comments: 12

Post Full Vestibulectomy - 5 Years Later - Please Read

Tue May 02, 2017 6:18 pm by jen007

Hi All,

It's been awhile since I've written a new topic on the forum. Wondering if any of the same ladies are still here. I've come back to update you all on my post vestibulectomy results. I can't remember if I've done an update on my current state, so forgive me if this is repeated information... I can't remember how to view my old posts! Anyway, let me get on with my update.

For 4 years post …

Comments: 3

Recovered from Vulvodynia

Thu May 04, 2017 9:42 pm by chancesunny

Hey everyone,

Im a new member on this forum and wanted to share my story so I can help anyone who is feeling helpless. Maybe what worked for me can work for you. I'll try to make this short so you can go get better!

I had vulvodynia for about 3-4 years. In the beginning, it started with pain that I thought was just a yeast infection and then I thought it was a urinary tract infection or …

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New here, my story and looking for advice

Wed Apr 26, 2017 9:02 am by rachiecakes

Hi All!

I was really hoping to get some feedback from everyone here - it's very hard dealing with an issue like this because no one really understands what I'm going through!

Im 28 years old I've had interstitial cystitis for 3 years - but never an vaginal issues. About 6 months ago I got a yeast infection following a course of antibiotics - similarly I developed IC after a bad UTI. The itching …

Comments: 4

New w/ Secondary Provoked Vestibuldynia

Wed Apr 26, 2017 11:46 pm by Birdy

Hi everyone,

I'm here because I'm pretty sure I have secondary provoked vestibuldynia, even though my gyno is still "optimistic" it is not.  My problem started six months ago when I got my second UTI in as many months (after going 25 years of life without one) and then ended up with a bad yeast infection (also my first one ever) thanks to the antibiotics.  Ever since the yeast …

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Male visitor

Wed Jan 18, 2017 11:19 pm by outsider

Hello!

I am a 25 year old guy who has erectile dysfunction following an injury a few years ago. I am here because I think that men and women with sexual dysfunction could benefit from dating each other. My experience has been that women have lost interest when they found out that penetrative sex was not possible with me.
So I am interested in learning more about female sexual disorders. Do young …

Comments: 3

New Here: Question/My Story

Mon Apr 03, 2017 2:00 am by overit14

Hi everyone. I came across this site by Googling "vulvar pain support". I feel like my case is different than most I read about so I was wondering if anyone else here experiences this in the way that I do.

This started in 2012 and has happened off and on since. I get really, really red and it's very painful, swollen and burns. Sometimes it may be a little itchy, but mostly it just …

Comments: 6


HOPE - a success story

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HOPE - a success story

Post  aperson on Sat Mar 23, 2013 6:31 am

Hi everyone, I'm new here, but wanted to chime in on a public forum to drop some knowledge that you don't usually see elsewhere. Like you, I've spent a significant amount of time online looking for people's stories of triumphing over this horrible condition. Like you, I tried all the obvious fixes - no standardized laundry detergents, no shampoo down the back, a plethora of vaginal cremes, fish oil and a host of other natural medicines, altering my diet (I gave up alcohol and went gluten free for two months which...sucked). Like you, I struggled with debilitating body aches, and like you, I tried to have sex through the pain, AND like you, my relationship was ruined - my ex cheated on me with multiple people, saying that if I hadn't developed vulvodynia he probably wouldn't have strayed (but I know that was NOT a valid excuse, hopefully like you Smile ). I thought my final resort was medication, but I grew up with fairly holistic parents, and it seemed like a backwards solution - after all, medication hadn't started my condition, so how was it going to get me out?

I have a ways to go, I'm not fully recovered by any means, but I'm here as a success story, because most of the time in these forums you don't see success stories. The people who work their way out of vulvodynia seldom return to tell the tale. It is an ugly part of our lives and I imagine when we're out, we won't want to relive it.

So here's my tale, as short as possible: I'm a 26 year old white girl, no history of trauma or abuse. Two years ago I developed a UTI, and then two more followed within short order. I had never had one before, and, not knowing what the problem was, I waited FAR too long to go to urgent care. The strain from the first UTI damaged my muscles and nerves down there, the subsequent ones really pushed it over the edge. If you've ever had a UTI, you know that going to the bathroom can become a bit of a fear, so the trauma to my lower regions became severe as I tried to minimize urinating. THIS IS A MISTAKE. If you have to go, DON'T hold it in, you will do damage to your body.

As mentioned before, I was in a relationship at this time. The pain during sex started off fairly mild, it just felt kinda weird down there. Trips to the gyno revealed that there was "nothing wrong" - the worst diagnosis you can hear, as I'm sure many of you are aware. At least if there's something wrong, you can go about trying to fix it. Being told nothing's wrong is just perplexing when you're prettty sure you feel pain. Over the next six months the pain went from mild, to strong, and then finally unbearable. It got to the point where I couldn't sit down without excruciating pain. Itching, burning, discomfort, I've seen it all. Here's the next step: DON'T try to have sex through the pain. It should be obvious, but the obvious is never obvious when dealing with matters of the heart. For over a year I was in constant pain from the abdomen down. The only thing that dulled it was going to sleep, which was sometimes hard. I ate a lot of advil, as imagined, and I spent a significant amount of time on these forums feeling so awful for all the women like me, and especially for the ones who'd been suffering for 10, 15, 20 years.

When I found out my ex had been cheating, my body went into such a tension-overload, that (and sorry if this is tmi), I developed painful anal fissures. I'm almost thankful now, because it's what drove me to seek out physical therapy. PT was recommended from my gyno, and I went without expecting success. I'd been suffering for about a year and a half at this point, and I was resigned to living in constant pain, but of course, willing to explore whatever possible treatment was available. I am a changed person because of it.

My physical therapists showed me how the network of muscles and nerves that coalesce in our vaginal areas run all the way down our legs, it's almost like a web. As we put strain on our muscles, they tighten up, and actually shorten in length, cutting off circulation and damaging the nerves. What is the therapy like? The first part is fairly ordinary - breathe. The underlying cause of vulvodynia (that's vulvodynia, not vulvar vestibulis), is tension: so breathing exercises help you drop your pelvic floor and teach your muscles how to relax. I had to retrain myself how to sit the right way at work (I have a desk job), and I had to retrain myself how to go to the bathroom. My therapists gave me an exercise ball that I use daily. I roll around on it, find places where the muscles are tight, and do breathing exercises to loosen them up. Most importantly, I've developed a daily exercise routine. I have to do this daily, but it's worth it. I am SO much more flexible than when I started (which was only August). Results? The worst part of my vulvodynia, aside from losing my sex life, was that I had chronic pain in what I assumed were my kidneys, but turned out to be the muscles in my lower back. Within a month of exercising that pain was gone. Occasionally I have a flare up (closer to my period), but I'm telling you, the dissipation of that pain alone was what made me continue with therapy.

The second part is a little trickier. The therapists do minimally invasive therapy (like when a gyno does a check up, but no metal props and they're much MUCH gentler). The therapist will use a gloved hand, and gently apply pressure internally to where there is high sensitivity or pain. Then you apply breathing exercises and, in essence, work out those internal muscles too.

Now, I'm 26 and I've only had sex with two people in my life, but I'm not ashamed of my body, and I was willing to do whatever it took to get better, and that included working hard and being diligent. I know there are some of you out there (I've seen it on the forums), who tried therapy once, didn't have immediate success, and were too embarrassed or ashamed to be working that closely with a therapist. My advice to you: just DO it. For many of us, it took a significant amount of time, over months or years of stress and tension, that got us into this mess in the first place. You can't expect overnight success, and if you're embarrassed, just think of how you WILL get better through therapy. Medication is no sure fire way to victory over V, and most of the time you'll end up on several different doses with no long-term relief. The best thing to do is develop healthy habits.

I've been with my therapists now since August, and with the exception of a few rare, though uncomfortable flare-ups, my external pain is mostly gone. I can sit without pain, I can go to sleep easily and I never take advil anymore. If I feel tense, I exercise. If I notice I'm slipping into a tense moment at work, I breathe through it and the pain dissipates.

One thing I know is that I'm not ready to have sex yet. Internally, I still have issues, but not nearly as bad as before. The more I stretch, the more my muscles loosen up, and the more that happens, the less damage I'm doing to my nerves. The healing process is going to take some time, but therapy gave me something that I wasn't even anticipating, and that was HOPE. This condition may AFFECT me for a significant period of my life - I know that I have to exercise daily, likely forever, to prevent flare ups - but it will not RULE me.

The last note I'll say here is that I'm lucky enough to have affordable health insurance through my work, and I live in a large city with access to care. If you are not one of those people who has health insurance, go to a specialized therapist, just once, and have them teach you breathing techniques and exercises. You can even do the internal exercises on your own with the help of a dilator (which is territory I'm starting to move into now, also with success). They cost about $20 a piece, but it's well-worth it for the relief. Have the therapist show you how to use it if you're unfamiliar with your body (don't worry, I think a lot of us girls are, and there are no stupid questions). If there aren't physical therapists in your area, make a phone call. Just reach out and start a dialogue - you have nothing to lose and everything to gain.

Most importantly ladies, DON'T GIVE UP. We are so much stronger than we give ourselves credit for.

Wishing you all the best!

aperson

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Re: HOPE - a success story

Post  Sarah001 on Sat Mar 23, 2013 2:07 pm

Thank you so much for posting your story, I'm doing the PT approach myself and I'm sure it's my problem although I have a very long way to go due to another condition I have that complicates matters. I agree that lots of women give up too soon or more commonly don't do the homework in between sessions which is vital and I often read stories on here and other sites of women with UTIs, constipation and anal fissures etc and immediately think pelvic floor when I see them. I'm really pleased you're getting success from the PT and wish you a complete and permanent painfree pelvis in time.
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Re: HOPE - a success story

Post  Kathy100 on Sat Mar 23, 2013 5:36 pm

Hi, thank you so much for sharing your story & the success you are having. It makes me more determined to continue. My story started in a similar way to yours with some pain with sex followed by UTIs . I saw various doctors / specialists had the usual raft of tests which all came back clear so I was told that there was nothing wrong. It didn't happen every time & was told it was just something to live with, drink cranberry juice etc. Later on I split with my ex so no sex meant no UTIs and it was the least of my worries. Then last August got burning V pain all the time & was soon balancing on the edge of chairs, not wearing jeans, seeing doctors specialists, etc etc.- my whole life turned inside out. Meantime I & my muscles were just getting more and more tense.

I've just started PT, stretches at home and am really hoping that it will help. Thanks again for your story and good luck.

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Re: HOPE - a success story

Post  Alana3 on Tue Mar 26, 2013 5:24 pm

Thank you for your story- mine also started too with a raging UTI and the idiot doctor I was seeing kept putting me on more and more antibiotics even after my UTI because I had burning itching, stinging- we all know how that goes. So because of that I got all sorts of fun stuff from over medicating like yeast infections and BV. Than I found out that the doctors office wasn't sterilizing their equipment properly so I got ureaplasma fricken disgusting!!!!

So I finally had enough and went to a urologist because I couldn't stop peeing and as well all know going to the bathroom every 5 minutes is not a thrill. So he couldn't find anything wrong with me, but did a pelvic and I flipped out it hurt so damn bad, so he was the one who suggested I go to see a physical therapist. I did that and it did help for a good amount of time, but unfortunately for me (afer 9 months of once a week therapy sometimes more) I relapsed and the pain became so bad that it was really hard to live my life. She suggested I go see a doctor in Orlando, Florida who told me that I had possible IC and endometriosis yet SHE TREATED ME FOR VULVODYNIA I later found out. I was uncomfortable with her touching me so I went back to the regular doctor and he said everything was fine and gave me diflucan for the yeast. Finally, I couldn't take it anymore, the doctor was a moron and the physical therapy which once helped wasn't doing the trick anymore.

So I went to another doctor who told me everything was fine and that I could go on acyclovir (herpes medicine) for my vulovdynia. Hold up- I don't have herpes AND that isn't even a treatment for vulvodynia!! Luckily, I broke out in hives (in retrospect this was luck) and had to discontinue taking the medicine. Finally, I found a vulvodynia specialist and he told me to try a compound and continue with the therapy just to see where it was going. He discovered I had strep. I took another antibiotic and got that taken care of (yay me). Unfortunately, the pain from vulvodynia was so severe I couldn't take it anymore, so I opted for surgery in December. However, once I got the painful skin and nerves removed I resumed therapy because my muscles were sore and tight. And I have seen so much improvement. I also dialate twice a day, but my doc wants me to consider botox, but I am doing physical therapy because I can see a difference currently. I hate this condition because not everything works for everyone. But for now, I consider myself a success because the painful nerves are gone and the therapy is helping. I just don't even want to consider botox, dear god that sounds awful! And even better, I just found out I was STD free (my ex cheated on me too) and that was a concern at one point tha a doctor had which put me over the edge.

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Re: HOPE - a success story

Post  aperson on Wed Mar 27, 2013 1:40 am

Hi Alana3,

I'm so sorry you had to deal with ureaplasma, that sounds just awful. I feel so terrible for the women who write about it on the forums. Question for you - post-surgery, have you had sex? My condition hasn't called for it and hopefully won't, but l'm curious about how much of the thrill is gone after having the nerves removed. (Then again, I suppose some thrill is better than none at all.)

It really is annoying that there's no set answer for V. I'm guessing it's because it was chocked up to classic women's hysteria in the past and no one bothered doing the research until relatively recently. The answers are so varied that it seems like one person might say "therapy solved it!" and another would say "i took antidepressants, but only on full moons when the tide was out", and another would say "i gave up eating fish, listened to some Beatles albums backwards and painted my room a different color" and you're left thinking WHAT? Really? THAT'S what did it?

I can't wait until there's more awareness in general, but then that's hard to obtain when it's such a private condition. None of my friends know. They just think I really don't like riding bikes haha. Smile

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Re: HOPE - a success story

Post  Alana3 on Wed Mar 27, 2013 1:47 pm

Your response made me crack up laughing! I love it!

Ok for surgery, it was a 6 week recovery I had it in December like I said, but I haven't had sex. HOWEVER, I use my personal stuff and it feels no different than before my surgery (except of course the excruciating pain is gone- pelvics are easier too and I passed my qtip test with flying colors I can't believe that made me want to die before I don't feel it now at all yay!), I am still lubricated and have every sensation that I have always had previously, so no complaints. I still get turned on, still have every sensation, but of course there's going to be some hesitation until I can get it thru to my vagina that hey, you're alright now, we've had many conversations she doesn't like me lol). Remember though it is different for everyone- I only had a partial vestibulectomy too so it could be different than if you got the whole thing done. But I don't regret it at all! I can't wait to have sex, but I am waiting for a boyfriend... I'll probably be 90 when I find him, but hey at least I can say my vag is working (tho at 90 I may not be lubricated ger)! The reason it's so varied is there's so many different kinds of pain and where the vulvodynia is. Some people have vaginismus where your muscles spasm, that's where I am right now, fun times! But at least all women have that to SOME degree, but nothing like what I or others on here experience. Mine was also provoked, but I had no problem riding bikes and thankfully horses as that is where I spend the majority of my life lol. None of my friends did know, but I finally opened up to them and I actually found out one of my friends has the exact same problem. When this condition affects 1 in 4 women at some point in their life, I feel like its a good way to educate people. There's actually a woman at my barn who complains of vaginal pain and everyone was making fun of her because she "isn't doing anything strenous" hey people THAT SHIT HURTS! They're like it's in her head, I got pissed, because if you're telling people that it more than likely isn't in your head and you have a legitimate problem. But yeah the treatments do vary and surgery is your last resort, but I don't regret my decision for a minute. It was the best decesion I have ever made for myself. I honestly hated taking pills, putting creams on, saying it hurts too bad to have sex, use the child speculum on me- enough was enough cut the damn skin out and let me recover and live a normal life!

Where are you located? Let me know if you have any other questions- but if you do end up going that route- I promise it's not a big deal!

Alana3

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