Pain After Surgery

I know some of you have had great success after having a vestibulectomy so I thought maybe I could ask you all a question. Like I've mentioned before I had a partial vestibulectomy on December 24th and things were going well. I had my stitches removed last Monday (the 20th) and my doctor told me everything looked great and that my husband and I could try having sex this week but that it might be a little sore due to the scar tissue not being so stretchy. Well, it really hurt! But in a different way than it hurt before. It wasn't the stinging, raw burning pain like a thousand paper cuts and it didn't swell up a lot like it used to but it still really hurt and we had to stop. I was wondering if any of you had a similar experience and if so how long it lasted? Do you think vitamin E would help? Or any other suggestions? I'm lost.

I used dilators for a few months after surgery so I could control it and get used to it again. Also, I did physical therapy. You probably have a bit of vaginismus and are especially tense since it's always hurt you tense up and your muscles might spasm. I got muscle relaxers for that. The trick with the dilators, is to leave them in until your muscles start to relax and than move it in and out. You can start with a small one and go up to the big one. My doctor said if that didn't work I could do botox, but I decided to try this first. And it really worked. I would dilate for 10 minutes in my shower everyday either in the morning or after work. Also, if you stick your stomach all the way out and hold it there it will release your pelvic floor and help with spasms. But honestly what youre feeling now is more than likely muscle spasms. I would never in a million years have gone straight to sex. You need to be in control of your vagina right after this surgery. So try the dilators and get the name of a pelvic floor physical therapist and you should be set in a few months! Vitamin E is not going to do anything for you. It's all about exercise like any other muscle hope this helps

Another suggestion, if you want to have sex with hubby (which I totally understand don't get me wrong!) have him just stay in you for a bit without moving. I don't know how exciting this will be for him or you, but once I started having sex again, that's what my boyfriend did for me and than we would do our thing after I felt comfortable. But remember your body has just gone thru a traumatic experience.

Ok, that makes a lot of sense. Thank you! I went to physical therapy for a few months before I had my surgery but I haven't made any appointments to go back afterwards. I think I'll try dilating like you described and look into returning to therapy. Thanks for the quick response! It's really appreciated.

No problem- let me know if I can help you at all! Definitely go back to therapy it helps a lot!

I had my surgery on December 17 and just tried to have sex for the first time today (husband's birthday). I've been to four physical therapy appointments in the past four weeks with homework three times a week, but I don't think I was ready yet. I felt like my skin was tearing at the six o' clock position and I think my pelvic floor dysfunction might be worse than before. He said that it felt like my body was trying to push him out, even though I was attempting to relax. Very disappointed right now, but I have to keep trying.

I'm sorry, Fingerscrossed. I understand how you feel. I never returned to PT after surgery but I did work at home on dilating for a while. After that I did what Alana3 had recommended and just put my husband inside me as much as possible with out it hurting too much and just sat there, we literally didn't move and I just focused on relaxing. I made sure to be on top so I could control everything. It hurt a little but each time we did it it hurt a little less and I could handle a little more. It definitely wasn't exciting or sexy but I think it helped. Aside from this we started focusing on other intimate, sexual acts without penetration and I think in a way this helped ease my anxiety some. Just a couple of nights ago I was able to have pain free sex for the first time in six years but I still had some swelling and pain afterwards that lasted most of the next day. So I can't say it's 100% better but it's SO much better than it was. Don't give up.

Try a lot of lube

Hi Guys! I'm really happy I found this post today. I had surgery on December 11th and just tried having sex this weekend. I wasn't on that large of a dilator size yet but I was drunk and hopeful. It hurt a lot and I couldn't get it in more than 2 inches, but we stopped immediately after I felt like something wasn't right. It's reassuring to hear that I'm not alone though. I am really nervous because I have trouble identifying what muscle pain is supposed to feel like, and I'm always trying to analyze if it is "normal pain" or not. It felt kind of like a burning on the muscles near the opening, but wasn't similar to the pain I had before. The burning feeling is what really freaks me out. What does the pain actually feel like with you guys?

I guess it feels like burning. If you read up to my other replies I would suggest doing that and not going at it when you're drunk especially if you haven't done it yet. Take it slow you just had surgery and things haven't had a chance to heal all the way yet it takes a good 6 months. Also try lube my bf and I use about a half a bottle (granted we have sex for hours but still haha). You're going to have to retrain your muscles and your brain because everything is expecting pain and you may subconsciously be tensing up. Which causes pain.

I have actually had two surgeries (the first removed very little tissue, and I found a much better doctor after). While things are MUCH better than before, I do still have pain during sex, and I have random flare-ups. It's disappointing but I have to remember how much better life is now.