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» I don't know what to do anymore
Yesterday at 5:05 am by SinclairSassy

» Social Security Disability Benefits
Tue May 22, 2018 7:22 pm by SinclairSassy

» Cleveland Clinic - Pain Management, Weston, FL
Tue May 22, 2018 7:13 pm by SinclairSassy

» Finally found a place for me...
Mon May 21, 2018 4:08 am by mtsp

» UK Vulvodynia Clinics
Sun May 20, 2018 9:58 am by katycrawford

» 8 years and struggling
Thu May 17, 2018 11:22 pm by Kezz

» Vestibulectomy recovery question!
Thu May 17, 2018 11:11 pm by Kezz

» Gabapentin Gel. or other topical creams
Thu May 17, 2018 11:55 am by Rosie21

» What has been helping ME (much less pain over time!!)
Wed May 16, 2018 3:43 am by leoscc

Gabapentin Gel. or other topical creams

Thu May 10, 2018 9:43 am by Rosie21

Hi I have been suffering for some years with this abominable pain. I have tried most of the systemic drugs , I asked specialists and Doctors if I could at least try a topical treatment but because this requires a special prescription have been refused Has anybody had a chance of trying these? Thank you I will try to put a link on to some of the research into Gabapentin Gel. Thanks.

Comments: 1

What has been helping ME (much less pain over time!!)

Wed May 16, 2018 3:43 am by leoscc

Hello everyone! I vanished for quite some time as my life became consumed by not only this but other daily responsibilities as well. Shortly after my diagnosis, my boyfriend f 3 years left me as he did not want to deal with this. It left me broken for a while but also gave me time to figure out what the heck was going on. So, I will write out a quick list of my symptoms and what helped me.

1. I …

Comments: 0

I cured myself 100% of vulvodynia twenty years ago--I hope this helps someone

Mon Mar 12, 2018 4:33 pm by totallycured

Hi,

Every so often I'm reminded of the constant, persistent, horrible pain I was in two decades ago, and I reach out to try to help others who are suffering. If someone had offered me a solution during that terrible time, I'd have jumped at it. I hope this helps someone.

Yes, I did have terrible vulvodynia. It felt like someone poured acid all over my vulva. My doctor confirmed it and was …

Comments: 4

I'M NEW - Do I listen to my gyno who I feel has it wrong?

Fri Mar 09, 2018 6:17 pm by Tunes25

Hello!

I am a 25 year old woman and wanted to share my story here as I feel frustrated by the suggestions of my gyno and am hoping for some advice.

To give the context for this: in September 2016 I moved in with my long term boyfriend after living abroad a year and (nearly) abstaining from sex. Within a few weeks I had got a yeast infection which I treated myself successfully, but then 2 weeks …

Comments: 5

Condoms Less Painful?

Mon May 07, 2018 3:35 am by stillinpain

I'm just curious, has anyone found using condoms to be less abrasive to the skin than without? I just got off birth control and haven't stretched myself out enough post surgery to try sex yet, but when I do I am wondering how trying it with condoms with affect the sensation. I feel like for me the skin to skin sensation creates pain, not just at my entrance but internally, too, since I also have …

Comments: 0

Will there be an end?

Fri Apr 27, 2018 12:06 am by Krista2828

I go in and out of being okay and not being okay with this condition. I question often why me? I am a problem solver by nature and I feel so defeated that after tons of research and trial and error and doctors and tears that there still is no answer.

I am in my 20's.. it shouldn't be this way.

Id love to know what all has worked! I am willing to try anything to get my life back. I am curious …

Comments: 6

you can be healed so easy and quite fast.

Thu Apr 26, 2018 11:46 pm by pussycat

Hello everyone,
i am new to this forum. I wanted to share my personal "journey" with V with you and to give you a real hope you can be totally healed/recovered from V. Many years ago i was struck with V, it was painful and got worst and worst, eventually i could not sit, could not stand, could not walk, could not swim in a swimming pool anymore. I was becoming bedridden, it frightened …

Comments: 4

Hi Im from Australia :)

Sat Jan 08, 2011 1:08 am by emma

Hi girls... I live in Australia.
I am currently undergoing a new treatment for vulvodynia. Just wondering if anyone else here has tried it. It's Endep in the form of cream to apply directly on the area. I dont know if anyone else has tried this but so far evidently it has had a 50% success rate.
Anyway i feel at a loss. This new treatment is exciting but at the same time i just dont feel like …

Comments: 35

Somebody please help me...

Fri Nov 24, 2017 8:05 am by Andlag

Hey everyone,

since I started being sexually active i often experienced burning in my vagina which was often worse during sex /around the time of my period or when using lubricants. I was never able to use tampons because the one time i tried putting them in it felt like acid was poured on my skin. Fast forward to 2 months ago when I got a UTI and an allergic reaction in my vagina. I thought it …

Comments: 14


Pressure to have sex.

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Pressure to have sex.

Post  alexvulvo on Sat Feb 25, 2017 10:36 am

Hi everyone,

I'm new on here but so glad to have found this forum. I've had vulvodynia since I was 17 (I'm 26 now), and I've gone through the regular ups and downs, culminating in two of the best treatments or aids I've had - a vestibulectomy and post operation physical therapy with a wand.

My issue is that I've grown to associate sex with pain, and it's just not something I'm very interested in most of the time. My partner and I have seen a mindfulness sex therapist that encouraged me to live in the moment and that way, to invigorate a mood for sex. It's worked periodically, but for the most part it hasn't.

My partner was a virgin before he met me (he was heavily involved in church), and it seems that this inexperience coupled with my distaste for sex is undoing an otherwise happy relationship. I feel pressured to have sex when I don't want to. My partner seems to feel truly loved only when we sleep together. We aren't having very frequent sex at all, but he often rubs against me, makes sexual comments even after I've expressed pain earlier that day (having 'a bad day' as I call it), and yesterday he saw a woman on my Instagram feed and asked me 'Who is THAT?' in a very sexual way that threw me off completely. It was like he had forgotten he was with me and not one of his guy friends.

I was so shocked I didn't really say anything again, but I know he meant it the way I took it because he's since been overly loving, and even asked if he could help me with physical therapy. He's also become More vocal about other women's beauty, and he keeps sighing really heavily when people have sex in a movie we're watching, for example.

I'm scared that he doesn't know what he's doing is wrong. I can tell him but my opinion isn't altogether trusted because I've got something against sex. Then again, I feel like I'm going crazy for being upset and that it's not fair for me to complain. I just feel pressured and sad, and disappointed. Am I wrong to feel this way? I'm just so tired of sex having this negative role in my life. Will it ever stop? Do any of you have partners that don't do this? Or have any of you overcome these challenges?

Please help if you can.

alexvulvo

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Re: Pressure to have sex.

Post  Kezz on Thu Nov 02, 2017 10:59 pm

Hey hun, sorry you didn't get any replies to this sooner. I hope you're doing okay. Your boyfriend may not realise how unhelpful it is to sigh when sex scenes come on etc. Those little things can be very hurtful. I hope your situation has since improved? Xx

Kezz

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Re: Pressure to have sex.

Post  aspaceodyssey on Fri Jan 19, 2018 4:30 pm

alexvulvo, not sure if you still check the forum but just in case, wanted to extend my deepest sympathy for what you're going through. I've been there, down to having to hear sighing during sex scenes, and know the lonely painful feeling very well. I hope you are ok and have found some resolution through this situation. be gentle with yourself and don't do anything that hurts you or that you don't want to do, ever. I know it's easier said than done sometimes when you are under this pressure, and I hope that has let up. do you have a therapist or anyone you feel comfortable and safe opening up to and sharing this with? if not, I would encourage you to pursue that. I know it's difficult but you need and deserve that support. also, know that this can and will get better. I was in very much the same place and thought I would never enjoy sex or have a normal relationship, but even after dealing with this for most of my life (primary vulvodynia here), things turned around really quickly once I found the right treatment and a little added therapy/self-love and self-care to undo the years of trauma. I can barely even remember now what it felt like to be going through the worst of this, and I know the same will happen for you.

feel free to pm me anytime. hope you are doing well <3 hang in there!

aspaceodyssey

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I can so relate!

Post  Sad on Sun Apr 15, 2018 2:00 am

I have been dealing with this off and on for seems like 20 years. It has caused me to have really negative thoughts and attitude about sex. It's to the point that I hate it. I've tried to like it for my husband's sake, but I absolutely cringe when it is "date night". He has been patient and kind, but trying other non vaginal sex has not worked for either of us and I am to the point that I would rather deal with the pain than trying other things just to get it over with. He can't understand why it is so problematic for me to try other things, but honestly it all just puts me off. He thinks I should want to make him feel good even if I can't.
I feel terrible that I want no part of it. It's such a big guilt trip, I constantly berate myself. I feel as though I can't escape it. Everything is so sex related in our society.
He thinks we should get counseling but that is not an option in my mind. We know several couples that went for sex counseling and it ended in divorce every time. I can't do it. I can't talk to a complete stranger about such an intimate subject. I know myself, I would completely shut down. We went to a marriage retreat a few years back that was totally about sex and it shut me down in the first 5 minutes. This kind of thing does not open me up to the conversation, it does just the opposite.
I am at my wit's end. I hate myself, the pain is unrelenting. If we have sex I hurt for 2 to 3 days after. So, we try to have sex only once a week, but that means for half the week I'm hurting. How long can you live like that, hurting for half of every week?
I don't know what to do. I've tried physical therapy, I've tried numbing shots. I'm skeptical of surgery because I've heard stories from people that say it was worse after surgery and I can't do worse, it's bad enough as it is. I'm just done.  Sad
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Re: Pressure to have sex.

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