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» Hope to all my suffering ladies
Why are doctors in this country such inconsiderate idiots? EmptyFri Oct 23, 2020 12:04 am by ringostarr26

» Please tell me this can get better
Why are doctors in this country such inconsiderate idiots? EmptySat Jul 18, 2020 7:38 pm by sammykramer

» By no means cured, but doing much better!
Why are doctors in this country such inconsiderate idiots? EmptyMon Mar 16, 2020 1:26 pm by tinkerbelle2

» How I cured my Vulvodynia!
Why are doctors in this country such inconsiderate idiots? EmptySat Dec 07, 2019 11:54 am by Millie

» 7 months since the diagnosis
Why are doctors in this country such inconsiderate idiots? EmptyWed Aug 14, 2019 2:38 am by agtoronto

» Gabapentin Gel. or other topical creams
Why are doctors in this country such inconsiderate idiots? EmptySat Jun 15, 2019 5:22 pm by mary jane

» IMPORTANT FOR UK SUFFERERS
Why are doctors in this country such inconsiderate idiots? EmptySat Jun 15, 2019 5:21 pm by mary jane

» Help New Diagnosis
Why are doctors in this country such inconsiderate idiots? EmptySat Jun 15, 2019 5:07 pm by mary jane

» 6 days post Vestibulectomy - Is this normal?? please tell me about your postop healing process!
Why are doctors in this country such inconsiderate idiots? EmptyTue Jun 11, 2019 12:56 am by VVSSufferer

Gabapentin Gel. or other topical creams

Thu May 10, 2018 9:43 am by Rosie21

Hi I have been suffering for some years with this abominable pain. I have tried most of the systemic drugs , I asked specialists and Doctors if I could at least try a topical treatment but because this requires a special prescription have been refused Has anybody had a chance of trying these? Thank you I will try to put a link on to some of the research into Gabapentin Gel. Thanks.

Comments: 2

Putnams 'bony parts' cushion or Putnams 'Dr Huff' cushion - which is best?

Sat Aug 01, 2015 4:17 pm by Fielder

Hi everyone,

I'm a newbie.  I live in the UK.  

I'm trying to work out the best cushion to get for my vulvodynia.  I suspect that I could have pudendal nerve involvement (the aching and burning pain is from vagina to clitoris) and I have rectocele and some tailbone pain too.

I have seen some good reports on older threads regarding the Putnams pressure relief cushions....with some ladies …

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An absolute success story- please read!

Fri Mar 08, 2019 10:57 pm by Persevere1990

Dear All,

I posted on here back in March 2017 having just got a diagnosis of vulvodynia after a few months of relentless and acute pain. I was desperate, I was hurting, I was scared I would never know life without pain there again.

I tried creams, acupuncture, numbing gels, frozen pads, baths with various internet recommended concoctions- convinced myself I had lichen sclerosus, herpes, thrush- …

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I'm sorry im rambling

Thu Feb 21, 2019 5:49 am by Jet227

hey, im 19, ive been struggling with this almost a year. The first week I became itchy I went in to check about a yeast infection another week later. I have been to 10 different doctors a total of about 15 appointments for this problem for the past 11 months. I have been tested for everything including having a biopsy. I was first told basically to just go home and use hydrocortazone, then I went …

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New member need advice please

Thu Feb 28, 2019 11:33 pm by PANDORA123

Hello, I have just been diagnosed with unprovoked vulvodynia. Im really scared and worried. It burns a lot and it hurts to sit down. I have been prescribed amitriptyle 10mg. Can anyone give me some hope that I can get better from this condition. Feeling low and depressed.

Thanks

Comments: 5

MonaLisa Touch

Fri Feb 08, 2019 7:35 pm by rl2091

Hi All,

I'm wondering if anyone has any experience with the MonaLisa Touch treatment for Vulvodynia? My pain started when I went on HRT(pill) for anxiety mainly and my pain abruntly stopped when I stopped HRT. However, when I started on the HRT patch (at my dr's suggestion), the pain returned and has never left. That was 7 years ago. I found MonaLisa Touch on the internet purely by accident …

Comments: 3

Diagnosed Recently

Tue Jan 08, 2019 3:55 pm by flissyg

Hi All,

I’m so glad I’ve found a place where there are others who understand how I feel!

So this is my story:-

I’m 36,  and 4 months ago, whilst innocently sitting in bed reading I experienced a very sharp stabbing pain in my clitoris. It last only a few minutes and then subsided as quickly as it came on. It put it down to “one of those things”.  The following morning I woke up …

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New and need advice and help

Wed Dec 05, 2018 3:26 pm by Cin124

Hi everyone,

About three months ago, I started having vaginal and vulval itching. Then, about two months ago, my vulva started to feel painful and look swollen, so I went to the doctor. I was tested for herpes, chlamydia, and gonorrhea which all came back negative. I also had to do a vaginal swab test and the only thing that came back positive was yeast infection. I was prescribed hydrozole …

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New here would very much appreciate advice at the end of my rope

Wed Jan 09, 2019 9:09 pm by Jma990o

This might be a little long but it's been such a long time I've even been able to talk about my problems openly thank you in advance for any helpful advice.
So ok I'm 24 I've been having this problem for over two years seen quite a few doctors and obgyns alike and nobody will take me seriously I have had a few utis and yeast infections and even bv once and this all started after one of the utis …

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Why are doctors in this country such inconsiderate idiots?

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Ceriane
lisadoc
itchyandscratchy
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Mouse
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Post  lolainslacks Sat Apr 30, 2011 9:32 pm

I am so fucking sick of doctors. Every time I seek help for this hellish problem, I am let down horrbily by a doctor who is either an insensitive bitch, or completely incompetant.

I was eighteen when I had my first gynecological examination. I knew I had a serious pain problem, and I wanted to get to the bottom of it. But when I explained my situation to my GP, she sighed, looked at me like I was an idiot, and made it clear that I was wasting her time. When she examined me she did so roughly, and when I started crying she asked me in a drippingly patronising tone "so you've never had a boyfriend then?" She told me the only reason I had pain was because I was inexperienced and tense, and that I was physically normal. When I insisted there must be something wrong, she agreed to refer me to a psychosexual therapist. But I never heard back from her.

The next doctor I saw about the problem I knew I had, gave me the most brutal physical examination I've ever had. She laughed at me when I told her I thought something was wrong, she went straight in with two fingers and NO lube, and she refused to stop even when I screamed in agony and tried to push her arm away. It went on for several minutes, with me begging her to stop the whole time. Afterwards, I was given the patronising "you're just tense" talk. I went home and cried for an hour, and my vagina hurt for days.

The next doctor I went to see sent me to an actual gynecologist. However, I could only see the gynecologist if I first agreed to see a psychosexual therapist, because again, it seemed unlikely that I had an actual physical problem. This therapist told me I was physically normal, but "if I asolutely must see the gynecologist" then she would refer me. This whole process of referral took OVER A YEAR.

The gynecologist I was sent to agreed to remove my hymen, and I was put on yet another waiting list for surgery. It went well, and things have improved for me, but I still have a lot of pain, which is when I self-diagnosed with vulvodynia. I thought that now everything was out in the open and it was clear that I had this problem, things would go smoothly and I would be treated more kindly by medical professionals. I was wrong.

I was sent back to the psychosexual therapist to talk about my progress. Let me remind you that this is a woman I had met only once before, and spent only five minutes with. This time, she told me that now my hymen was gone, I should start having sex as soon as possible, because it's an 'adult' thing to do. She said that I acted like a child, and spoke like a child, and that through having sex I would finaally be able to 'grow-up'. She then asked if I had a boyfriend, and when I said no she asked me if I had a male friend I would consider losing my virginity to, because it would make her job easier if I was already in a sexual relationship.

WTF?

I had an appointment with my gynecologist last Monday to talk about vulvodynia treatments, and although she STILL wasn't convinced this was my issue, she agreed to give me lidocaine gel. I was prescribed 5%, which I had to ask my GP for. When I got to the GP, I was told I couldn't have it, because they only gave out 2% now. Also, I wouldn't be able to pick it up for a few days. I waited until Thurdsday, then went to collect it because I was told it was ready, but after travelling all the way there, I was told that actually it would be another day. On Friday, I finally go to collect it, AND I AM ONLY GIVEN TWO FUCKING DOZES. I am supposed to apply the gel two times a day, indefinately, for a long-term condition, and they only gave me two dozes. Two single-use syringes. THANK YOU, MEDICAL PROFESSIONALS, YOU COMPLETE TWATS.

And because of the fucking Royal Wedding, and the stupid public holiday on Monday, I have to wait until Tuesday to get back to my doctor to sort this fuckery. It just blows my mind how these people can continuously screw me over. I am living with a fucking nightmare condition that makes any chance of a normal sex life/relationship impossible, and leaves my most sensitive part in agony, and I feel like I am never being taken seriously, and am being left to deal with this on my own.

I apologise for the length of this post, I just needed to get all that out. It was cathartic, like writing a diary entry or something. I'm just so furious with how I am continuously treated that I can barely function.

lolainslacks

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Post  lisa98 Sun May 01, 2011 12:26 am

I share your frustration- so many of us have been fucked around and hurt by insensitive medical professionals. It helps to remember that it is because they are human, flawed and can only base their knowledge on the scant research on this condition. There are people everywhere who are not as good at their jobs as they should be. I just wrote this on another thread, but I recommend writing to the doctors you mentioned and complaining- they need to know how crap they are so they can improve. It helps if you do that with a diagnosis from another professional that shows them exactly why they were so wrong (since they obviously arent able to take you seriously on your own). I did this with my gyno only recently and found it cathartic and healing. I can now get rid of my collection of voodoo dolls with white coats. Smile

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Post  Mouse Sun May 01, 2011 10:57 am

What a load of horseshit you have had to deal with! I'd also write a letter to the medical council. What a collective bunch of fuckers (well you started the swearing =) I'm dumbfounded you haven't found a decent Dr amongst that lot. Have you been to a vulval clinic? Or a pain clinic? I'd recommend both. It's unbelievable the way you have been treated. My gyny was bloody stupid and her receptionist was an absolute bitch but I found a really lovely specialist through the vulval clinic. On my own I might add. I wouldn't return to any of those idiots. I guess you are in England? There should be a vulval clinic at any larger hospital. I also recommend a therapist, a proper one! Dealing with this crap every day takes a lot of courage, it really helps to unload.

Owww that makes me mad! It's bedtime otherwise I'd rant a bit more!

Take care xx.

Mouse

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Post  Sarah001 Sun May 01, 2011 7:28 pm

Oh yes the wonderful NHS, envied by the rest of the world because it sounds so good on paper! Have you tried a GU clinic instead? They can prescribe the things you need there or write to your doctor and tell them what to prescribe. They can also refer you to a vulval clinic and getting referred by a dept that deal with the genitals is a good option. I've been lucky as a brilliant consultant at a GU clinic diagnosed me after a few months and she's steered my course so far so I haven't had too much fuckery but the bit I did have at the start before I found her would regularly have me in tears. And yes, bloody bank holiday and stupid royal wedding are ruining things for me too!
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Post  itchyandscratchy Mon May 02, 2011 6:11 pm

Wow, these experiences are really shocking, I agree with mouse you should consider reporting some of these people to the medical council!

I mean what kind of an idiot 'psychosexual therapist' recommends to a young girl suffering with chronic vaginal pain that she should go have sex with any random guy as soon as possible, regardless of whether she wants or not? =s

The dismissive attitudes towards pain during examinations is shocking but familiar as well, I can relate to that one, I also had my first gyno exam whilst I was experiencing chronic pain and before I'd ever had sex, I bled for two days. =|

I guess I'm lucky in that the second doctor I saw (one I'm still seeing) was much more sympathetic about pain during exams and had actually heard of vulvodynia.
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Post  lisadoc Wed Aug 03, 2011 10:15 am

yes i agree, have saw so many doctors on the nhs and not one of them much help, my first gynae appointment and they told me , nothing to see must just be thrush, omg, was ready to knock them out and they insisted on taking a swab even though entry with the speculum was horrendous, i nearly jumped off the table as soon as it touched me but they kept on going regardless. were they blind or just stupid i wonder!!!!
now seeing gynae private( money talks!!) so am hoping i get somewhere with them.

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Post  Ceriane Wed Feb 29, 2012 4:20 pm

I'm shocked by the way you have been treated...it seems really strange the way you have been made to feel about yourself. For a start...you didn't even go to your GP about a sexual problem...yet it's being treated as one...despite the fact your not even sexually active yet...and lots of people aren't at 18....your still just really young...if the pain was being caused by being tense and inexperienced when it comes to penetration you wouldn't even know that yet...you were there basically cos of vaginal pain and your being made to feel as though you have a psychosexual problem when sex hasn't even been a part of your life yet ...not because of any medical or psychological reason but because your just a young teenage girl who hasn't met the right guy yet...the average age for becoming sexually active is 17 and your only just a bit older than that...(obviously it would affect you sexually if you were to become sexually active but this may have cleared up long before you decide to have a sexual relationship!) also why are they treating your virginity as a medical problem at 18 or even at any age (why do you need your hymen surgically removed for a start?). It seems so strange that the advice the psychotherapist gave you was to go and lose your virginity to anyone as soon as possible...that is REALLY wierd...how is that going to solve your vaginal pain...some people don't start having sex until well into their twenties...and they don't worry that there is something wrong with them...if you meet someone and want to have sex with them at 16...great, go for it...or at 18 or at 28 it doesn't matter as long as your both happy with it...there is nothing wrong with your sexual development...your being made to feel like an overgrown child just because your 18 and haven't had sex yet (when LOADS of people haven't, I hadn't and it didn't enter my mind there was something wrong with me, I was 19 when I lost my virginity and to me that seemed a little bit older than average but I felt right with the situation and it never entered my mind that there was anything physically or mentally wrong with me (this is pre vulvodynia) I just didn't think about it till I met someone I wanted to have a sexual relationship with) ...(so the 13 and 14 year old chavs who sleep around and end up pregnant are mature are they? Waiting until you are older ie 16 or above, and in a stable relationship is the mature thing to do in my book)....you should be proud of yourself and you have the right to keep your virginity for as long as you like. Until you meet someone and want to sleep with them this isn't a sexual problem. There is nothing wrong with you other than a sore vagina for goodness sake which may well be long gone before you ever have sex. If the vaginal pain is still an issue when you do meet someone and want to have a sexual relationship with them, that is the time to treat it as a sexual problem...and if it's causing anxiety and difficulties around sex then is the time to see a psychosexual therapist.

When you went to your GP they should obviously have asked if you were sexually active to rule out STDs. When you weren't they should have just screened for thrush, BV etc and concentrated on dealing with the generalised pain...you didn't need to be referred to a psychosexual therapist. If it was still a problem when you wanted to have sex...or you were sexually active and it was still a problem, then that is when you need to see a psychosexual therapist about it. This is what happened with me.

In my experience they usually ask if your sexually active to rule out STDs, if your not they treat it as a pain problem rather than a sexual problem. If you are they rule out STD's, then deal with the pain (as well as screening for general infections and gyno problems)...and also if your in pain during the tests you have every right to say so...and they are usually quite apologetic about causing you pain (I tend to just go through it...but I think I'd be traumatised if they weren't sympathetic about it). You can also get referred to a psychosexual therapist if sexual pain/anxiety affects a relationship (I went to one for anxiety about penetrative sex which I felt was holding me back from getting into a new relationship because I'd experienecd vulvodynia and vaginismus as a result in a previous relationship and this had affected how I felt about sex)....I was in my mid twenties at this point and she was wonderful...made me feel that I deserved love (that was the main issue we worked on) and that if someone cared about me they wouldn't run a mile just because of my problem and that there should be more to the relationship than just sex...ie a foundation of love and trust...they should see you as someone they're in love with not just someone to have sex with, a lot of it was about rebuidling my self esteem again and realising that I was worthy of love and worth so much more than just my body! ...when we moved onto how the sexual problem would affect a relationship she suggested taking it as slowly as you need to ....don't rush into it...and that there are other ways to be intimate other than penetration, but when you do decide to have penetrative sex again...work out where your anxiety starts and build on it...ie you can get used to just being intimate again, and then build up to penetration...ie you can start with using dilators to overcome the fear/vaginismus...etc. This is how you should have been treated.

My advice...find another GP, gynaecologist (get screened for yeast infections/BV and other gyno issues ie cysts they'll know what to test for if you describe where your pain is and what sort of pain) and when you do decide to have sex if there is still pain and anxiety see another psychosexual therapist. I recommend Relate as they were really good with me. If anything the advice they gave me was the opposite from the advice you were given by the psychosexual therapist.

Sex is an important part of a relationship...but your worth so much more as a person than what you can give sexually...sex is just an expression of your feelings towards each other and it's an equal thing! ...and you can do what you like with it.

Ceriane

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Post  lolainslacks Wed Feb 29, 2012 8:14 pm

Thank you so much. I am 21 now, turning 22 this year, and still not sexually active, although I'm comfortable with that because I share your view that sex should be part of a loving relationship (at least that's what I need it to be, personally). I first started seeking help when I was 17/18, and have only just recently started being treated correctly. That's how long it's taken.

My hymen was removed because it was thicker than it should have been, and initially I thought that's where my pain was coming from. My gyn suggested it would be easier for me to start using dilators if my hymen was removed, which is why they performed surgery. Trying to break it naturally would have been virtually impossible, that's how thick it was.

But other than that, you're right, every piece of advice I was given was utter bullshit.

I am lucky in that I was able to do a lot of research myself online, and pretty much everything I have gotten so far in terms of recovery (dilators, lidocaine, pain meds, etc) are a result of me doing my own reading, and then demanding treatment. If I didn't know as much as I do now, I doubt doctors would have given me any help at all. I had to do all of the work myself.

I am also lucky in that I don't believe a word of what the psychosexual therapist told me. I think if I had been younger and more impressionable, what she said would have really hurt me and caused a lot of damage, but I am secure in my values and beliefs, and I am able to realise that she is an idiot. I know that sex is not what makes a person an adult, and that in actual fact, the mature thing to do is wait until I am ready.

Since I posted this I have been put on pain medication and it has helped a little. Used in conjunction with the lidocaine gel, I don't think sex will be a problem. Which is a relief. It would be lovely to not have to use the gel as it is really unromantic and annoying, but I'm happy just to be able to have sex, which wasn't possible before.

Anyway, thank you for your kind words. It's awful how many ridiculous medical professionals are out there.

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Post  Ceriane Thu Mar 01, 2012 10:00 pm

That's brilliant Lolainslacks!!! I'd love to be able to have pain free sex and not worry...I'm sure loads of women have similar problems....it's just taboo. I have good and bad days with it now...they've linked my problem to vitamin B deficiencies and candida and as long as I'm on top of those things I'm fine.

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Post  LadyBusiness Wed Mar 14, 2012 3:08 am

I'm so sorry you had to go through that! I'm pretty sure any doctor here in the US could get sued (and fined and fired) for saying things like that. Most doctors I've seen weren't supportive, but they at least weren't as openly awful. Sad For years, the main symptom I had was how much I hated pelvic exams (and how much they hurt). The gynecologist and nurses would give me these looks, like I was someone crazy to pity. I asked if there was any reason it might hurt me more, and the doctor replied, "I guess you might have some vaginismus from the tension...I guess..." as if she thought it was in my head; I ended up believing that it was all just a psychological problem and something I should be embarrassed about, like I wasn't natural. When I was finally diagnosed by a much more attentive doctor, I felt vindicated, though also really blue, of course. :\

WTF, doctors! I wonder if they know how much influence they can have. I finally found a good urogynecologist who listens to me, but I still worry about how knowledgeable any of them are about vulvodynia. Does anyone get the impression that no one really knows enough about it?

I'm so glad you've found insight into what causes your pain, Lolainslacks, and that the lidocaine has been helping! (I also definitely agree about sex needing to be meaningful.) I've been usuing lidocaine as needed, but my doctor just prescribed gabapentin cream, which I need to pick up from the pharmacy (chemist?).

Take care!

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Post  lolainslacks Wed Mar 14, 2012 9:12 pm

Thank you, LB! You are totally right, it's almost impossible to find a doctor who knows what they are talking about when it comes to vulvodynia. I am always taken aback by how many of these people there are in the medical field -- you would think that if you hated caring for others and didn't care about helping them, becoming a doctor would be the last thing on your mind. And yet, every doctor I meet seems to be hideous. It's a mystery. And a great shame, because there are many people who will go untreated due to a lack of interest from doctors.

Interestingly enough, this week I had to go back to by GP to get my dosage of amitriptyline raised, and I was sent to the first doctor I saw in the very beginning. When I saw her at 17, she was really irritated by my questions, and insisted it was all in my head, so I was expecting her to give me some trouble this time as well. But when I went in she was really lovely. I could see that she had my file open and had been reading it before I came in, which means that she now knows she was wrong and that I actually do have something very serious wrong with me. I think she must have been feeling guilty, because the whole appointment went really well, she was really sympathetic and accommodating, it took me totally by surprise. As you can imagine, it was really satisfying for me, I was childishly thinking to myself "yes, you should be feeling guilty after what you put me through! I was right and you were wrong HA HA HA." But of course I said nothing.

I'm so glad you have found doctors who listen to you. It's unfortunate that this is a condition that is not widely known, but the people you are seeing seem to know what they are talking about and at least are willing to help. I hope the gabapentin cream works for you!

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Post  penfebruary Fri Mar 16, 2012 2:12 pm

Hi, I'm also in the UK (the midlands) and reading these posts I was just wondering what people meant when they say pain clinic/vulval clinic/ GU clinic??
The closest I've been to a specialist is the gynaecology department of my local hospital, but I've only seen 2 people there - 1 who didn't know much about vulvodynia, though at least he was nice, and another woman who barely spoke to me through the whole time I was there, poked and prodded me roughly even though I told her she was hurting me and got really huffy at me if I dared to ask any questions about what she was doing. She told me I probably had herpes, even though I have already been checked for all sexual infections, several times, and the one sexual partner I've had since my V began also doesn't have herpes, and when I asked her how I could check this if the normal tests weren't good enough for her she told me I'd have to try and get an appointment mid-flare although this would 'probably be impossible' and then booted me out. Really helpful. This was on Monday so I'm still pretty upset about it.

So yeah anyway sorry, rant over! Could anyone tell me a bit more about these? If they know any in the Midland's that'd be great, if not I'm obviously prepared to travel or whatever, I'll do pretty much anything to have a conversation with someone who might know what they're talking about..
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Post  Loulou Fri Mar 16, 2012 11:29 pm

Hi Penfebruary

Don't know about pain or vulval clinics but I was diagnosed at a GUM clinic (Genito-Urinary Medicine clinic) - unfortunately I think these are sometimes coloquially referred to as 'clap clinics' but i just swallowed my pride and went I was so desperate to get an answer! you should have one in your area, google it or ask at your local GP surgery they should have info. You can usually get in quickly (some even have walk in centres where you don't need an appointment which could be helpful if you want to be tested for stuff mid-flare) or you could even phone first and ask if they have someone who knows about vvd so you don't have a wasted journey.

Lx

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Post  Sarah001 Sat Mar 17, 2012 1:00 pm

GU clinic has already been explained in the post above but there are certain hospitals that have vulvar clinics, I'm not sure exactly where you are but I was told Sheffield Hospital has one and there's a gynae at Nottingham called David Nunns who specialises in vulvar pain too. Most hospitals have a vulval dermatologist who also covers vulvar pain and they tend to visit on a monthly basis, ringing your local hospital and going through to dermatology would give you the answer to that one. All large hospitals have a pain clinic where they basically offer meds, injections, nerve blocks etc so getting referred to one of those should be something any GP can do but it does help them to know why you have pain so ruling out all known causes first (or ruling some in) would help them tailor your treatment more to your needs. A good place to start is making an appointment with a consultant in a GU clinic, you can do that without your GP and go from there because they can rule out infections on the spot and refer you on to either of the other above options. If you haven't been to physio your GP can refer you but make sure they know it's a Women's Health Physio you need and not a bog standard one.
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Post  ivyrose Thu May 03, 2012 11:56 pm

I have experienced exactly the same crappy treatment from doctors. Now, against the odds, and without the help of my doctor, my vulvodynia has cured by a chiropractor (I had a trapped nerve.) I've posted my story on all topics so that as many women read it as possible! please have a look and don't give up x

ivyrose

Posts : 27
Join date : 2011-07-16
Age : 30

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Why are doctors in this country such inconsiderate idiots? Empty Re: Why are doctors in this country such inconsiderate idiots?

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