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Anyone have pain with urination?

Tue Oct 16, 2018 2:35 pm by mertzwl

Hi everyone - I can't believe I've been dealing with this for almost 10 years and an appointment scheduler at a urogyn office is the one to suggest I look into vulvodynia. Honestly, I don't care, I just thankful I might have an answer.

I have pain in one specific spot right around the urethral opening so it always coincides with urinating (it's not a uti). Does anyone else deal with pain …

Comments: 6

Diagnosed recently, looking for advice

Sun Sep 02, 2018 12:51 am by Cloudberry

Hi everyone,

I'm so glad I found this forum! I was diagnosed with vulvodynia/vulvar vestibulitis (still not sure about the difference between all the different terms) a couple of months ago and I could do with some advice. This is probably going to be a lot of text because I just want to get everything off my chest, so please bear with me.

I’m a woman in my late 20s. Before getting diagnosed …

Comments: 4

From a concerned husband

Thu Jul 12, 2018 10:45 pm by ConcernedYorkieHubby

Hello everyone,

This is probably a little unconventional, but I’m a man who is here because his wife has been diagnosed with vulvodynia. The poor girl has been suffering with vulva pain for around 10 years now, and I’ve been by her side through the pain and tears and doctors misunderstandings the whole way, and we’re both exhausted and terrified by the whole experience.

I’m sure a lot …

Comments: 4

Had this for 5 years, looking for people who understand

Sat Oct 06, 2018 9:46 pm by blackberrie

Hey all. I'm really struggling to find anyone in real life who can really understand what I'm going through. I've had vestibulodynia for 5 years now and I'm single. Obviously it has completely affected how I approach dating and sex and the fact that I can't really talk to people irl about it has made me feel very lonely. I've found that a lot of the women who have this problem are married and …

Comments: 2

6 year sufferer but I’ve found some hope

Wed Oct 10, 2018 1:33 am by Npage14

Hey, ladies! I’m new to this support group, I’ve thought about doing something like this for a while so I wanted to try this out! I’ve had vulvodynia for 6 years now, I am self diagnosed. I’m 20 now and the pain started when I had my first encounter with sexual contact when I was 14(I still remained a virgin though it was fingering). For a couple years the pain was so bad I could hardly …

Comments: 0

Hurting, Burning, Itching, and Worn Out

Thu Aug 09, 2018 10:55 pm by donnambr

This vulvodynia that I'm currently suffering with is so cruel. I hurt, I burn, I itch. When I first got this several years ago, before the internet, I though I was the only one with this awful disorder. Doctors couldn't figure it out. I felt so alone and devastated. Somehow it disappeared for a few years and now I'm suffering again. This dreaded V misery is back and I feel like I will be with …

Comments: 5

Hi girls! New in this forum

Fri Jul 13, 2018 2:31 pm by Gaby

Hi everyone!

Also joining the V club, Here my story:

It all started last year in september with a very bad throat infection for which i had to take antibiotics for about a month. This cause several yeast infections (candidia albicans).... one after the other!. I had them every month from october 2017 till march 2018. During this period i use an incredible amount of anti-fungal creams and …

Comments: 1

Newbie and feeling helpless

Wed Jul 11, 2018 1:52 pm by Taylor1

Hi, I found out a few weeks ago that I have this condition, started off at the end of April as a uti took strong antibiotics then got a thrush infection and now this.. My doctor has tried me on amitriptyline and gabipentin and both made me so poorly I couldn't take it plus I have seen what long use of these drugs has done to my mom for pain and its not good. I am using coconut oil which does …

Comments: 3

I'm new to this forum and would love some advice! :)

Tue Jun 05, 2018 4:13 am by anikita

Hi lovely gals!

I'm honestly hoping to get any bit of advice anyone might have to offer. I go from bouts of sobbing hysterically in my boyfriend's arms to feeling confident that I can beat this.

I haven't been actually diagnosed with vulvodynia but EVERYTHING under the sun has come back negative. I started having sex 4 years ago after starting Lo Loestrin, with my first and current boyfriend …

Comments: 6

Don't know what to do.

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Don't know what to do.

Post  SO FUSTRATED on Wed Nov 02, 2011 8:40 pm

This is my story.
I am 25 years old and never had pain free sex. The first time I tried at the age of 17 I knew something was not right. That relationship ended shortly after because he went to college. I was not in a relationship until I turned 20 and I was totally fine with that because I thought it was easier. I started to date a kid that I had known for years. I was very straight forward with him about my "issues with sex" and he was fine with it because "we are so great together". We get along great, enjoy a lot of the same stuff (camping, fishing, hunting etc...) We have been together 5years now and have tried everything you can think of (positions, numbing cream etc...) It took me a number of Dr.s before I found one that would actually listen to me about my pain. She sent me to a specialist that finally had a clue. Now I just started seeing a pelvic floor therapist who is great. I think that the birth control had a horrible effect on me that I didn't even relize till I got off it. ( was taking for bad periods) Now here is the worst part. I have always had this huge guilt that we don't have sex and feel like such a failure as a women. I should have tried harder over the 5 years but it was fustrating and discouraging and every Dr. just made me feel like I was crazy so I just gave up. We have always had fun doing plenty of other things. I know that my boyfriend would have asked me to marry him if he thought that I could give him a child. (I know that this is a big fear of his and mine) I recently found text messages from him to another girl. He swears nothing happened (it was suppose to happen that weekend) and that he doesn't think that he could have gone threw with it. I believe him I know that he loves me and truly believe that if we just had sex that this wouldn't have happened. Now I don't know how to get passed the hurt and trust him again. I want to so badly, just so sick of feeling like crap. I wanted to go talk to a therapist that is experienced in sexual problems but he wants nothing to do with it. (says he doesn't believe in them) If you love someone wouldn't you do try anything to make it work. Sorry its so long but thats my story


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Re: Don't know what to do.

Post  noni on Thu Nov 03, 2011 2:49 am


First, it really breaks my heart to read about your struggles. Its not easy, this difficult road we are on. But its even harder when youre in a relationship. It complicates things.

I know its challenging getting good medical care. Im on Amitriptyline for the nerve damage. Its doing an OK job I guess, for others its a nightmare to be on.

Theres just so many layers to this disorder. Theres the physical, debilitating pain, but then theres also the emotional strain. Its hard to keep going, when doctors are telling you you're a nut. And on top of that, you gotta satisfy your man so he doesnt go astray. Lots of anxiety and depression, hopelessness.

Its gonna get better. We've all had those dark and isolating moments, when everything turns to shit and we wonder why the hell this is happening to us. Dammit, there are 15 year olds getting knocked up, and here I am wondering if I'll ever be able to conceive properly and carry a child for 9 months.

I could write a novel here. But I wont. I'll spare you my anguish and turmoil.

Just pray or meditate or laugh or read....sometimes when we focus our energies too much on this monster condition, it consumes us. I know I need a vag break. Im gonna take up a new hobby--cause obsessing over this is not going to better my situation.

I hope you have an understanding healthcare provider to atleast medically get you sound. I aslo hope you have a good emotional support system in place. Or maybe you're like me, I dont have one, so I come on here and the fb page and rant and pour out my worries to women who understand.

Girl, you aint alone in this.

You'll be in my thoughts love.


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Post  SO FUSTRATED on Fri Nov 04, 2011 2:00 pm

Hi Noni,
thanks for the reply I was very excited to see that somebody had something to say. It is nice to know that I am not the only one with this problem. I just want to have a normal relationship for once. It kills me when I see kids having babys or just how awfull some parents are.
Thanks Again,
So fustrated


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Re: Don't know what to do.

Post  SimplyBelle on Sat Nov 05, 2011 4:44 am

I believe him I know that he loves me and truly believe that if we just had sex that this wouldn't have happened. Now I don't know how to get passed the hurt and trust him again. I want to so badly, just so sick of feeling like crap. I wanted to go talk to a therapist that is experienced in sexual problems but he wants nothing to do with it. (says he doesn't believe in them) If you love someone wouldn't you do try anything to make it work.

My fiance and I are getting married in six months. It's been three months since we had one rare, rare, opportunity at pain free sex (everything before and after was painful). But, despite all the excitment of getting married, I sympathise with you. It's really really fustrating dealing with men who are at the height of their sexual curiousity... I'm just never in the mood, and if I do, my anxiety takes over. But he loves me, he's still going to marry me, you just have to have lots of communication and he has to be willing to make it work. There's only so much you can do --- sometimes compromising/coming to a solution isn't about meeting in the middle but meeting at the best solution that is best for the overall health of you.

You should just go to the therapist by yourself. It will help. Maybe, if he sees you changing your attitudes and behaviours he'll jump on board too.

I hate seeing kids having baby --- its worse when you fear that you might never have that opportunity to have that 'accident'. What I hate even more is when you're out with the girls and they start talking about sex, and all the great sex they have, and all the awesomeness, and the fun, and... you just dont have anything to say, because it just sucks.


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My Relationship

Post  AroraNightfire on Fri Jan 20, 2012 6:18 am

I understand your feelings when it comes to sex. I dont enjoy being penetrated by a penis. Ive been in a relationship for the past 5 yrs. Im living with him the past 3yrs. He understands my pain and doesnt want to make it worst. Sometimes when Im horney and I ask him to penetrate me he says its not a good idea because I'll hurt. He often asks me to give him a hand job. He's happy with that. I wouldnt be with a man who NEEDS sex from me. I feel if a man NEEDS and still asks for sex from me KNOWING I hurt during sex and HURT A LOT after for DAYS....HE'S A LOOSER and he's selfish. When two people truely love each other they find a way.

Yes I also understand how it feels when your listening to other girls talk about how much they love sex, and how their boyfriends do this and that great. It makes me miserable to listen to it...and I just walk away.

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Re: Don't know what to do.

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