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» From a concerned husband
Fri Jul 13, 2018 6:02 pm by emalita

» I'M NEW - Do I listen to my gyno who I feel has it wrong?
Fri Jul 13, 2018 2:58 pm by Gaby

» Hi girls! New in this forum
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» Newbie and feeling helpless
Thu Jul 12, 2018 6:35 pm by emalita

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» Hello. In Need of Advice, Please and Thank You. Long Read.
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From a concerned husband

Thu Jul 12, 2018 10:45 pm by ConcernedYorkieHubby

Hello everyone,

This is probably a little unconventional, but I’m a man who is here because his wife has been diagnosed with vulvodynia. The poor girl has been suffering with vulva pain for around 10 years now, and I’ve been by her side through the pain and tears and doctors misunderstandings the whole way, and we’re both exhausted and terrified by the whole experience.

I’m sure a lot …

Comments: 1

I'M NEW - Do I listen to my gyno who I feel has it wrong?

Fri Mar 09, 2018 6:17 pm by Tunes25


I am a 25 year old woman and wanted to share my story here as I feel frustrated by the suggestions of my gyno and am hoping for some advice.

To give the context for this: in September 2016 I moved in with my long term boyfriend after living abroad a year and (nearly) abstaining from sex. Within a few weeks I had got a yeast infection which I treated myself successfully, but then 2 weeks …

Comments: 9

Hi girls! New in this forum

Fri Jul 13, 2018 2:31 pm by Gaby

Hi everyone!

Also joining the V club, Here my story:

It all started last year in september with a very bad throat infection for which i had to take antibiotics for about a month. This cause several yeast infections (candidia albicans).... one after the other!. I had them every month from october 2017 till march 2018. During this period i use an incredible amount of anti-fungal creams and …

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Newbie and feeling helpless

Wed Jul 11, 2018 1:52 pm by Taylor1

Hi, I found out a few weeks ago that I have this condition, started off at the end of April as a uti took strong antibiotics then got a thrush infection and now this.. My doctor has tried me on amitriptyline and gabipentin and both made me so poorly I couldn't take it plus I have seen what long use of these drugs has done to my mom for pain and its not good. I am using coconut oil which does …

Comments: 1

I'm new to this forum and would love some advice! :)

Tue Jun 05, 2018 4:13 am by anikita

Hi lovely gals!

I'm honestly hoping to get any bit of advice anyone might have to offer. I go from bouts of sobbing hysterically in my boyfriend's arms to feeling confident that I can beat this.

I haven't been actually diagnosed with vulvodynia but EVERYTHING under the sun has come back negative. I started having sex 4 years ago after starting Lo Loestrin, with my first and current boyfriend …

Comments: 5

Gabapentin Gel. or other topical creams

Thu May 10, 2018 9:43 am by Rosie21

Hi I have been suffering for some years with this abominable pain. I have tried most of the systemic drugs , I asked specialists and Doctors if I could at least try a topical treatment but because this requires a special prescription have been refused Has anybody had a chance of trying these? Thank you I will try to put a link on to some of the research into Gabapentin Gel. Thanks.

Comments: 1

What has been helping ME (much less pain over time!!)

Wed May 16, 2018 3:43 am by leoscc

Hello everyone! I vanished for quite some time as my life became consumed by not only this but other daily responsibilities as well. Shortly after my diagnosis, my boyfriend f 3 years left me as he did not want to deal with this. It left me broken for a while but also gave me time to figure out what the heck was going on. So, I will write out a quick list of my symptoms and what helped me.

1. I …

Comments: 0

I cured myself 100% of vulvodynia twenty years ago--I hope this helps someone

Mon Mar 12, 2018 4:33 pm by totallycured


Every so often I'm reminded of the constant, persistent, horrible pain I was in two decades ago, and I reach out to try to help others who are suffering. If someone had offered me a solution during that terrible time, I'd have jumped at it. I hope this helps someone.

Yes, I did have terrible vulvodynia. It felt like someone poured acid all over my vulva. My doctor confirmed it and was …

Comments: 4

Condoms Less Painful?

Mon May 07, 2018 3:35 am by stillinpain

I'm just curious, has anyone found using condoms to be less abrasive to the skin than without? I just got off birth control and haven't stretched myself out enough post surgery to try sex yet, but when I do I am wondering how trying it with condoms with affect the sensation. I feel like for me the skin to skin sensation creates pain, not just at my entrance but internally, too, since I also have …

Comments: 0

how do i save my relationship?

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how do i save my relationship?

Post  joanna82 on Sun Nov 06, 2011 10:47 am

Hello girls,
i'm new here, and so glad I found this forum...
I have had pain during sex for 5 years now,at first i was told it was in my head, and i believed it, at least for a while... Then the pain got worse, started to affect me when using tampons etc, so i then realised no,it's not in my head. The damage in my relatioship was done though, as he was feeling more and more rejected and i started thinking perhaps i dont love him? that's why i dont wanna be intimate? etc...

I was formally diagnosed last tuesday although i had known for a while since i read on the net about Vulvodynia.... the problem is that the previous saturday my partner and i had a horrible fight, we said things and did things we both regret and that i am really embarrassed to even write about it... I dont know now how to recover, we have been really cold to each other, i know he is waiting for me to initiate sex to kind of "forget" about this fight (why do men always have to fix things with sex?!?!) but i cant bring myself to it..... WE have a mortgage and a small child, we've been toguether for so long, built a lovely life together, i really dont want to end it but i dont know what to do now, how to bring us both together again... The more i go without being intimate the coldest i feel towards him, it's like a vicious circle. And i'm not talking only sex, i cant bear the thought to even give him a hug... I really feel depressed. How do you know if it's just that i'm horribly depressed or i just dont have any more love left??

has anybody gone through this? how do you keep intimacy going through the pain (physical and emotional)?


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Re: how do i save my relationship?

Post  lolainslacks on Sun Nov 06, 2011 8:43 pm

I'm sorry you're having such a difficult time right now. How much about your actual condition does your partner know? It may help to really educate him about this as much as possible, so that he really realises that this is a legitimate medical thing, and not simply a personal rejection. Your lack of desire for any intimacy at all is absolutely understandable, and very common. Lots of women fear, even subconsciously, that something like hugging/kissing is a starter, something that will lead to sex. He needs to understand this as well. I think you should sit down and really have an in depth discussion, not only about the acutal mechanics of this disorder (so that he understands how much physical pain you are in and how it is not your fault), but also how it makes you feel about sex and intimacy. Then he may better understand that this 'coldness' is not a choice or a rejection.


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Re: how do i save my relationship?

Post  Aussie on Thu Nov 10, 2011 3:24 am

You also need to set a boundry. Set it at hugs. For a long time and let him know it can't go further because it hurts you. Then branch out a bit from there, and so on. This will help with the intamacy I am sorry you are having such a difficult time here. It might be worth couples releationship councelling? Or even just for yourself to sort your head out I know a lady on here (Mouse) who I haven't seen post for a while???? but she swears by therapy to sort her head out.



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Re: how do i save my relationship?

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