From a Childs Mouth

A congressman was seated next to a little girl on an airplaine so he turned to her and said "do you wnat to talk? Flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passengers."

The little girl who had just started to read her book, replied to the total stranger, "what would you like to talk about?"

"Oh I dont know," said the man. "how about global warming, universal health care, or stimulus packages?" as he smiled smugly. "K" she said. "those could be interesting topics, but let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow,, and a dear all eat the same stuff-grass. Yet a deer excretes little pellets while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps. why do you suppose that is?"


The legislator, visibly surprised by the little girls intelligence, thinks about it and says, " hmmm, I have no idea."

To which the little girl replies, "do you really feel qualified to discuss global warming, universal health care, or the economy, when you dont know crap?"

and she went back to reading her book

I mean no offense with the joke......just hope it makes someone smile

A little boy opened the big and old family Bible with fascination, and looked at the old pages as he turned them. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible, and he picked it up and looked at it closely. It was an old leaf from a tree that had been pressed in between the pages.
"Momma, look what I found!" the boy called out.
"What have you got there, dear?" his mother asked.
With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered: "I think it's Adam's suit!"

The boss of a big company needed to call one of his employees about an urgent problem with one of the main computers. He dialed the employees home phone number and was greeted with a child's whispered, "Hello?"
Feeling put out at the inconvenience of having to talk to a youngster the boss asked, "Is your Daddy home?"
"Yes", whispered the small voice.
"May I talk with him?" the man asked.
To the surprise of the boss, the small voice whispered, "No."
Wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Mommy there?"
"Yes", came the answer. "May I talk with her?"
Again the small voice whispered, "No".
Knowing that it was not likely that a young child would be left home alone, the boss decided he would just leave a message with the person who should be there watching over the child.
"Is there any one there besides you?" the boss asked the child.
"Yes" whispered the child, "A policeman".
Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked "May I
speak with the policeman"?
"No, he's busy", whispered the child.
"Busy doing what?, asked the boss.
"Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman", came the whispered answer.
Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded like a helicopter through the ear piece on the phone the boss asked, "What is that noise?"
"A hello-copper", answered the whispering voice.
"What is going on there?", asked the boss, now alarmed.
In an awed whispering voice the child answered, "The search team just landed the hello-copper."
Alarmed, concerned and more than just a little frustrated the boss asked, "Why are they there"?
Still whispering, the young voice replied along with a muffled giggle: "They're looking for me!"