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» Diagnosed Recently
Thu Feb 14, 2019 6:35 pm by davesjen

» New and need advice and help
Wed Feb 13, 2019 12:42 pm by feeling desperate

» New here would very much appreciate advice at the end of my rope
Wed Feb 13, 2019 12:33 pm by feeling desperate

» MonaLisa Touch
Sat Feb 09, 2019 3:46 pm by Julquint

» New member desperate need of other vulvadynia sufferers
Sat Feb 09, 2019 10:09 am by Tfc13

» The pain CAN get better - What's worked for me
Sat Feb 09, 2019 8:17 am by Ginger

» Remission and relapse and again and again
Thu Feb 07, 2019 1:10 pm by mary jane

» Long term pain after partial vestibulectomy?
Wed Feb 06, 2019 1:56 pm by mary jane

» Recovery story please read !!
Fri Feb 01, 2019 1:33 pm by mary jane

Diagnosed Recently

Tue Jan 08, 2019 3:55 pm by flissyg

Hi All,

I’m so glad I’ve found a place where there are others who understand how I feel!

So this is my story:-

I’m 36,  and 4 months ago, whilst innocently sitting in bed reading I experienced a very sharp stabbing pain in my clitoris. It last only a few minutes and then subsided as quickly as it came on. It put it down to “one of those things”.  The following morning I woke up …

Comments: 4

New and need advice and help

Wed Dec 05, 2018 3:26 pm by Cin124

Hi everyone,

About three months ago, I started having vaginal and vulval itching. Then, about two months ago, my vulva started to feel painful and look swollen, so I went to the doctor. I was tested for herpes, chlamydia, and gonorrhea which all came back negative. I also had to do a vaginal swab test and the only thing that came back positive was yeast infection. I was prescribed hydrozole …

Comments: 6

New here would very much appreciate advice at the end of my rope

Wed Jan 09, 2019 9:09 pm by Jma990o

This might be a little long but it's been such a long time I've even been able to talk about my problems openly thank you in advance for any helpful advice.
So ok I'm 24 I've been having this problem for over two years seen quite a few doctors and obgyns alike and nobody will take me seriously I have had a few utis and yeast infections and even bv once and this all started after one of the utis …

Comments: 3

MonaLisa Touch

Fri Feb 08, 2019 7:35 pm by rl2091

Hi All,

I'm wondering if anyone has any experience with the MonaLisa Touch treatment for Vulvodynia? My pain started when I went on HRT(pill) for anxiety mainly and my pain abruntly stopped when I stopped HRT. However, when I started on the HRT patch (at my dr's suggestion), the pain returned and has never left. That was 7 years ago. I found MonaLisa Touch on the internet purely by accident …

Comments: 1

New member desperate need of other vulvadynia sufferers

Fri Feb 08, 2019 6:55 pm by Tfc13

Hi there hope some1 reading this is going through the same shit as me!, I'm new to this so don't really know where to start , I'm Teresa , I've just been diagnosed with vestibular vulvadynia , after countless appointments with GPS being misdiagnosed, tested for god knows everything , eventually under my gynochologist ,who done all her necessary tests, I now have been given a diagnosis I'm in …

Comments: 5

Looking for suggestions or encouragement

Sat Jan 13, 2018 12:10 am by ryn207

Hi there. I'm 25 and have been dealing with this for over a year and a half and I'm really starting to lose hope this will ever stop.

In July of 2016 I had a yeast infection. When Monistat didn't work I went to my gynecologist who prescribed Diflucan. When the itching didn't stop she retested me and found that my yeast infection was gone, but I now had a bacterial infection. After taking the …

Comments: 7

I'm new to this forum and would love some advice! :)

Tue Jun 05, 2018 4:13 am by anikita

Hi lovely gals!

I'm honestly hoping to get any bit of advice anyone might have to offer. I go from bouts of sobbing hysterically in my boyfriend's arms to feeling confident that I can beat this.

I haven't been actually diagnosed with vulvodynia but EVERYTHING under the sun has come back negative. I started having sex 4 years ago after starting Lo Loestrin, with my first and current boyfriend …

Comments: 13

Hello. Happy to have found this group.

Fri Dec 07, 2018 9:01 pm by foxysugarpants

I am new here and hope to gain some insight into my vulva pain. I suffered for a long time not realizing that there are ways to feel better. I saw the Dr. yesterday and I am starting P/T pelvic and valium suppositories. queen

Comments: 0

Had this for 5 years, looking for people who understand

Sat Oct 06, 2018 9:46 pm by blackberrie

Hey all. I'm really struggling to find anyone in real life who can really understand what I'm going through. I've had vestibulodynia for 5 years now and I'm single. Obviously it has completely affected how I approach dating and sex and the fact that I can't really talk to people irl about it has made me feel very lonely. I've found that a lot of the women who have this problem are married and …

Comments: 3


How to ease sex

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How to ease sex

Post  Sallyjane on Thu Feb 06, 2014 8:27 pm

I have provoked vulvodynia. My boyfriend is completely fine about not having sex however I'm not and really want to be able to at least have sex with only minimal discomfort. Has any one found any treatments or anything to ease sex that has worked for them?

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Re: How to ease sex

Post  alessandria on Thu Feb 06, 2014 10:27 pm

Again... I mentioned this in the other thread, but you probably should hold off on penetrative intercourse until you can really lessen your provoked vulvodynia first, otherwise you are risking killing your libido in the future. Your brain WILL associate sex with pain if you're not careful, and it will "solve" the problem by not allowing you to get aroused ever. Patience is key, even if it is frustrating. That being said, if your pain is just at the vaginal opening, many women find lidocaine helpful (your OB/GYN will give you an aqueous solution that only will affect you, and not rub off on your partner). Because you said you are burning for hours after sex though, I'm concerned that this will not really help you the way you need it to. If you want a temporary solution, I'd give the advice of going slow, using lots of lubricant (Slippery Stuff seems to not irritate most people with V), and use lidocaine before starting. If you find there is pain as soon as the lidocaine wears off though, I'd refrain from having vaginal penetrative sex until you get some improvement.

I want to emphasize this: you can still be a sexual person! There are many people who cannot have penetrative vaginal sex who still have very fulfilling sex lives, and I encourage you to do some research on the topic and get some ideas. I have no doubt that you can fully satisfy your boyfriend and yourself if you keep an open mind.

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Re: How to ease sex

Post  mary jane on Sat Feb 08, 2014 4:08 pm

I have the same worry...I have pure neuropathy which responds to amitriptyline, I have a combo I want to try if I get the guts to try sex again: pregabalin, amitriptyline 50 mg, lidocaine or vaginal valium..... vaginal valium is used by a lot of the ladies with painful bladders (IC) and it helps ... you have a great boyfriend if he is so relaxed about it !
mary jane
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Re: How to ease sex

Post  Alana3 on Sat Feb 08, 2014 9:51 pm

I tried vaginal valium it burned life the devil

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Re: How to ease sex

Post  mary jane on Sun Feb 09, 2014 10:03 pm

rectal valium ?Very Happy
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Re: How to ease sex

Post  Alana3 on Mon Feb 10, 2014 12:03 am

If youre comfortable shoving something up your butt why not? But I've heard it can make your bowels loosey goosey haha but what is that gonna do with your hooha? Who knows it may work for you but keep in mind it ONLY worjs for muscle spasms so if you dont have muscular problems its not gonna work. So for you since you have redness (right?) It might not work.

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Re: How to ease sex

Post  alessandria on Mon Feb 10, 2014 8:10 am

Just as a heads up, the only randomized control study done on vaginal valium showed it was not effective for pelvic pain -- there's a good post here summarizing why it's probably not the best idea in the context of pelvic pain. (Just don't want you ladies spending money/time on something that doesn't work!)

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Re: How to ease sex

Post  mary jane on Mon Feb 10, 2014 9:32 am

sob sob I'll stick with my secret stash of narcotics then (=Tramadol/ultram)
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Re: How to ease sex

Post  Alana3 on Mon Feb 10, 2014 1:27 pm

Eh you don't know if something works until you try it so I wouldn't give that advice. It actually worked for me kinda but not for nerve pain its for muscles and not a miracle drug. Also tramadol isn't a narcotic I take it everyday where it acts like one its not classified as one. The only thing it really does is make you tired. If you can have sex knocked out more power to you! Lol And all it is is a painkiller it's not gonna treat anything or prevent. Your pain. It's just gonna mask it until it wears off. Same with valium.

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Re: How to ease sex

Post  Alana3 on Mon Feb 10, 2014 1:28 pm

But it wont give you side effects since its bypassing your liver

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Re: How to ease sex

Post  mary jane on Mon Feb 10, 2014 3:33 pm

I've taken it before in the past when I had bartholin cysts (pain from hell) and if it was able to work for THAT, then I kind of trust it to work again ??  the pills never made me feel sleepy, more like hyper and very drugged out/high Very Happy
I know I'm not treating my pain just masking it, but at least I can lead a life until I find a decent dr
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Re: How to ease sex

Post  Alana3 on Mon Feb 10, 2014 3:37 pm

oh itll help its just not gonna treat is all i'm saying. Smile continue with it, but try to find a more accurate treatment than popping pills.

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Re: How to ease sex

Post  mary jane on Mon Feb 10, 2014 10:36 pm

I'm screwed. I've fallen in love with a guy. I am so screwed. My pain consultant better give the maximum pills. better throw anything and everything at me
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Re: How to ease sex

Post  amy1918 on Thu Feb 20, 2014 1:47 am

I find it really difficult to have sex with my fiancé,he gets so frustrated and I do too,I just feel unbelievable discomfort and pain but all I get off people is 'it's in your head'..it's not in my head!! I feel so selfish because I've taken away my partners sex life and feel sometimes he'd be better off with out me..I need advice on least painful positions etc. Please help x

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Re: How to ease sex

Post  Alana3 on Thu Feb 20, 2014 2:46 am

Experiment what works for you may not work for me and you're not selfish

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Re: How to ease sex

Post  alessandria on Thu Feb 20, 2014 5:39 am

amy1918 wrote:I find it really difficult to have sex with my fiancé,he gets so frustrated and I do too,I just feel unbelievable discomfort and pain but all I get off people is 'it's in your head'..it's not in my head!! I feel so selfish because I've taken away my partners sex life and feel sometimes he'd be better off with out me..I need advice on least painful positions etc. Please help x

Amy, what have you tried so far to treat your pain? Vulvodynia is actually many different disorders with different causes, and how you work with it depends on what kind you have.

First. You are NOT selfish. You have had the bad luck of developing a condition that is both physically and emotionally painful, and while you and your partner might not be able to have vaginal penetrative sex the way you want to, that does not make you selfish. You are a strong person dealing with a bad situation the best you can. Your fiancé loves you, and that is something that transcends whether vaginal penetrative sex is something you can have all the time. I'm not going to lie and say vaginal penetrative sex doesn't matter, it DOES suck to not be able to have it painlessly, but there are a lot of other options for intimacy that should be your everyday go-to. I think it's important to be just as sexual as you were before, but to challenge yourself to find new ways to enjoy intimacy (there's a lot of things that most V sufferers can still do!).

When you DO want to have sex: do you have lidocaine? Do you use a large quantity of non-irritating lube? Do you make sure to engage in a ton of foreplay to make sure you're properly warmed up and ready for action? As far as positions go, it depends on your type of pain. If most of your pain is from insertion/withdrawal, any position that places a larger emphasis on grinding rather than thrusting will be less painful. If your pain is more in the vulva or clitoris, but less with insertion/withdrawal, find positions such that they're oriented away from contact while allowing penetration. As a rule, woman on top is a good idea for those with sexual pain, since it puts you in control of the angle, the speed, and the type of motion.

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Re: How to ease sex

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