Counting down and feeling overly anxious

1 week til I see the new doctor!

I am beginning to get very anxious and emotional... I get so worked up every time I see someone new. I get so scared of seeing new doctors because I usually get told that I will be stuck with this for life and that no-one can help me, and at the same time I am holding onto hope that the next doctor I see will be the one to 'save my life' and cure me, or at the very least give me something for relief.

I get myself worked up to the point of crying my eyes out...and I'm even worse when I come out of the doctors with no answers...I end up an emotional wreck.

Does this happen to anyone else or am I just crazy?

Any advice?

Wish me luck.

Been through this. Change your way of thinking about it, like say to yourself that this doctor may have another idea and lots of ideas can cure the problem. You wont have this for the rest of your life . You have to believe in yourself and have faith in an holistic approach to vulvodynia. I don't know if you have read my most recent post about my new job causing a big flare well my anxiety and stress has been extreme. But I have used positive self talk and went back to what got me through in previous times, l say to myself this f______ thing is not going to control me im controlling it. Your vulvodynia will be better bit by bit if not all gone over night it will happen. Be proud of yourself for getting through it and searching out for help. You will be ok xx Z

Also just wondering about your vomiting and nausea like when did that start ? Are you generally anxious and nervous ? Tell me about your personality if you want to ? I'm just trying to get a better picture of you as a whole. I have alot to do with anxiety as I suffer from it badly and am also studying to be a counsellor.

Thankyou so much for your kind words Zarli, I very much appreciate it.

I just read your post about your new job, you poor thing! I can't believe after 10 years your old boss wouldn't give you your job back. That's terrible. I hope things get better for you ASAP. Hopefully your stress and anxiety will cease when you settle into your new job a bit better. I know what it's like trying to work while on medications that make you all spaced-out and uncoordinated,  it's the worse feeling.

My nausea and vomiting started roughly a month after my vulva issue started, though it may have been earlier, I was so wrapped up in my vulva issue at the time I kinda disregarded any other symptoms until they were REALLY noticable. But before the vulva problem started I was extremely fatigued all the time and had no energy, which made me go off the pill. A month after going off the pill my problems started.

About 3 years ago I got diagnosed with an extreme anxiety disorder which I got councilling for and got treated with antidepressants.  I had the problem for about a year before I was cured and the whole time I had anxiety I did not have nausea or vomiting once. The way I feel now feels totally different to the way I felt back then. My symptoms with my anxiety disorder were extreme insomnia and disturbing nightmares to the point where my husband said I was screaming in my sleep.

I am currently taking the antidepressant Lexapro but it has done nothing except make me feel even more nauseous and everyone thinks I've been more emotional while on it.


I was 100% happy before all this started, my life was great. Great job, happy marriage, not a stress in the world. I am a naturally out-going, social and active person. Nowdays I'm none of those things

My nausea and vomiting is ALWAYS worst leading up to and during my period, and my vulva goes from itching to BURNING!.The week after my period I feel slightly better the nausea department, and my vag goes back to itching instead of burning. It is always the same pattern. I wake up every morning and literally as soon as I open my eyes I have to run to the bathroom to vomit. I also get bad reflux where my food involuntarily comes back up...and "spew-burps" as I call it where I need to burp and puke comes up with it. ..so gross :l

I did think that it was all anxiety but after writing down my symptoms every day in a diary I quickly noticed a pattern. And the doctors told me antidepressants would ease my nausea and vomiting if it was anxiety but it hasn't.

I have recently looked through my diary and realised that I have only had 3 periods this year.  When I do get my periods they are BAD. Painful and extremely heavy...For the first 3 days I can't even sneeze or cough without my pad over-filling and having to change it. I also get very bad period-like pain when i'm not due or on my period. All my symptoms combined are making me think it's gotta be hormonal in some way?

I've rattled on quite a bit! Whoops sorry! Thankyou for acknowledging me. Once again it us much appreciate it.

May I ask about your story? Your symptoms and how it all started for you?

I am here to support others as well as seek support. You probably have more knowledge than me with all you have been through so I may or may not be able to give any advice but I am here if you need to vent!  

I can understand why you're weary, but remember not all doctors are the same.  AND most women with v go thru an average of about 7 or so doctors before they reach their relief point.  I would say go in with a positive attitude and see what this doc has to say.  Hopefully you'll be strangely surprised!

Thankyou Alana

You are right, not all doctors are the same. I must be in the above average category with doctors, this will be doctor number 12! Mind you, this will be the first proper Gynecologist I have been sent to! No-one would refer me to one up until now! I saw a vulval dermatologist who was supposedly one of the best in Australia but she didn't help me at all and completely dismissed me when I told her the treatment she gave me wasn't working. Very disheartening when "the best in Australia" can't help!

On a positive note the doctor I'm seeing has vulvodynia and "skin disorders of the genital tract" listed as conditions he deals with. He practiced in Africa and America before coming to Australia so I am hoping he has more knowledge than the average Aussie Gyne. He is also a very Christian man so I am hoping he may have a more caring compassionate nature than the other a**holes I have dealt with.

I will not stop until I find the right doctor for treatment. If this guy doesn't work out the next stop will be the Vulva Clinic at the Royal Womens Hospital in Melbourne, which I have heard nothing but amazing things about from women on this site

Patience deary its rough but you will find help! By the way totally jealous yo live in Australia. I want to visit soooo badly! You probably have a really awesome accent too

But serious note, dont give up. I have a feeling this guy will help you. But try (and I know its hard) not to hurl before visiting. Go with a positive attitude and hopefully youll be very surprised! One never knows!I do know where youre coming from though. blah

How far from Melbourne do you live if you don't mind me asking?

Hey Zarli I live in New South Wales . If I do not get any answers with this doctor Melbourne will be my next destination.  I've heard so many amazing things about the vulva clinic at The women's hospital. Is that where you got your diagnosis and treatment?

Alana I am a real Aussie girl thats for sure (minus the typical "bogan" factor)! I work by a beach so I get lots of tourists from all over the world,  they come in and love listening to me talking and I'm the same with them! Where abouts in the world are you from? I will try my very best not to hurl...

I would love to know both of your stories too! Alana I read that you have endometriosis,  can I ask what your symptoms were/are? A gyne suspected I had endo about 3 years ago before all this V shit started but she couldn't have been bothered to investigate any further.

Hi I actually live in new south Wales too a border town to Victoria. I always say Melbourne cause its the closest city just 3 hours away. My story is boring I was about 36 I was going through huge stress in my life and had weird symptoms come like really horrid vulva pain all on the outside a rail way like red rash on my left thigh its the weirdest rash l have ever seen it lasted half an hour I read years ago another lady had the exact symptoms to me everything was on the left side I had burning mouth syndrome and burning heels then like a constant uti. All test for everything imaginable nothing showed up. My pain made me suicidal 6 doctor later I drove myself to an after hours clinic and the lady doctor relieving from Melbourne diagnosed me. Amiltriptilyn saved my life. I was referred to a pain specialist and the royal women's in melb and thats my story l might have it a little out of order as its been along journey 7 years now. Most of the time my pain is controlled by my meds. I used to be so worried about living with it my whole life but now I just accept its part of it and one day it might go away. Good luck with your new doctor you just never know when one of them will say yes you have this and you need that and your better. And remember nothing stays the same change is inevitable good things will come to you xx

I'm from Florida! And still jealous of you lol.. My endo story is weird!  So I always had heavily HEAVYYYY periods and would get them 2 weeks of every month or not at all.  So they put me on the pill where I could sorta function.  My periods have always been bad!  So after my vestibulectomy, my periods got even worse.  Even on all the birth control I've tried in the past year and a half, I would still get it early and bleed like crazy.  And if I were half a second late taking the pill the rest of the month was shot!  So I went from Mircette to Yaz (two a day) Zenchent (two a day), another one and then progesterone only.  Yaz was OK but I spotted everyday.  Zenchent was awful!  Boobs swollen, a week no bleeding (THE ENTIRE SIX MONTHS!), depressed/suicidal, horrific pain EVERY day, headaches, nausea, the works.  I was a miserable person.  Finally, I took myself off that and the doc told me I needed surgery OK so I sign up for that.  Then took a progesterone only pill within a day I couldn't get out of bed nausea, etc.  No thank you.  So I took myself off again have NOT had a problem since.  No yeast, no cramps (except first day of my period, but it was like a 2 instead of a 10), my boobs went back down to a C thank the lord!, I stopped bleeding except for 3 days of the month as opposed to everyday.  The only thing I have noticed so far is a little pressure during ovulation and a lot more discharge.  But I read this is normal.  I'm even looking to use tampons for the first time ever.  My doctor wanted me to try an IUD and there is no way in hell I want to do anything more to my body.  For the first time in 14 years I feel like an actual person, I'm just really tired all the time.  But that is probably because I am extremely active.  I have 2 jobs, I horseback ride, and I go to the gym, practice yoga! haha

So my symptoms: HORRIFIC pain to the point I cant stand up, yeast infections, migraines, nausea, it hurt like hell when I pooped during my period, low back pain, boobies hurt, Clots the size of newborns, bleeding every day and when I got my period it was horrific I had to wear bf's sweat pants and stay in bed.  We went flying one day (he's a pilot and I'm learning), I almost got sick to my stomach which never happens and I had to pee every ten seconds.  Plus I would go thru a pack of pads in a day!

My symptoms off the pill: No pain, no nausea, NO YEAST, boobs don't hurt, I still get a bit of back pain, but its manageable with advil/muscle relaxers/acupuncture, bleeding once a month for 3 days, didn't hurt to poo tho I had diahrrea (but its better then constipation and I cant spell that lol!), no migraines.

My doc says the pain/bleeding will come back, but so far so good, so let's hope it doesn't :/ oh and I don't have to have surgery so that's good too! Sorry this is insanely long, but it probably sounds neat as you're reading it in Australia accent AHHHHH I want to just listen to you talk!!!!! lol

Omg you poor thing!! That sounds horrifying, 14 years!!!!!! Thats so so so bad to go undiagnosed for so long and to be dealing with all that! How old are you?

Oh wow Florida! There's so many beautiful and interesting things to see and do there! You are lucky too!

A lot of your symptoms sound like mine! Although I know a lot of girly problems have symptoms that are similar to one another.

My periods have been really bad my whole life. Never ever regular, even on the pill, and when I am not on the pill (I have been off it since January because it wasn't fixing my V symptoms) my periods are super super heavy for the first 4 days, I can't even cough or sneeze without filling an entire pad, I cant jump out of the shower onto the bathroom mat because blood will pour out of me onto the floor everywhere. I pass massive clots that look like chopped liver and when they come out of me I feel like I am giving birth they are so big. I get extreme period pain to the point where I can't walk. I get migraines to the point of vomiting (but hey, I'm always nauseous and vomiting even when I don't have my period!). My cycle is not regular at all, I have only had 3 periods since January. Sometimes won't get my periods for 3 months at a time, it has been this way my whole life. When my period is heavy I get bad diarrhea (not pleasant).

I get a lot of clear clumpy sticky discharge when I don't have my period. My boobs get sore to the point that an accidental brush of a nipple makes me cringe! Though my boobs have shrunk a bit rather than gotten bigger, but this could just be from loosing so much weight due to vomiting and stress.

I get period-like pain when I don't' have  my period.

I have had cysts on my ovaries in the past. I ALWAYS get pain on my right ovary area that comes and goes. I have no idea what all that is about!

Like you I (used) to be a very active person. Always exercising (usually 2 hours a day), always out and about either at the beach or going on forest walks, going on all-day shopping sprees (my personal favourite! ). I don't do any of that now, mind you I am the skinniest I have been in years.

MY V issues get so much worse leading up to and during my period. And if I dont get my period for a few months my symptoms stay super-flared up until I get them. When The period finishes I feel slightly better.

How did your V problem come about in amongst all that shit? F*ck! It would have been horrible enough dealing with those terrible endo issues without having V on top of it! How the hell did you cope?? I take my hat off to you, to get through that shit and come out of it sane, you deserve a medal...or a bloody good holiday at the least!

Ill respond later its my anniversary with my boyfriend. I just didnt want you to think I'm ignoring you...

Zarli, only just realised you commented. Sorry! 7 years is a very long time, that is SO strange all your symptoms being on your left side! What the hell? That is so bizarre! Ugh, I guess you obviously know how incompetent most Australian doctors are and why I'm so damn frustrated!

What did they actually diagnose you with? Vulvodynia? Coz it sounds like there is so much more to it than that. I've never heard of symptoms quite like yours before!

Was your doctor one from the Melbourne womens vulva clinic?

It makes me so so so angry hearing all the poor womens stories on here.. how doctors can just leave people suffering for so long!

I think Australia is so far backward with medical its not funny!

Years ago I read a woman's story who h a d same symptoms as mine but it does appear rare. They have tested me for MS and I have had brain ct scans and every other test imaginable. The royal women's think stress and anxiety may have affected my nervous system. But at the end of the day im treated for vulvodynia. I believe there are so many varieties of vulvodynia and I suspect in years to come maybe when a Hollywood celebrity gets it they will cure it. Until then we all have to keep trying. All the best xx

I coped by just not giving up and found a cure and today I wake up with a UTI! Perfect!!! I just wanted to say take one day at a time, and keep a positive outlook- although some days I want to hang myself haha