Intro to My Scattered Brain and One WEIRD QUESTION

Hey guys, this is my first post.
I got diagnosed in Oct 2013 with pelvic floor dysfunction and vulvodynia. My doctor prescribed me with the hormonal cream and sent me to physical therapy. Both lessened my pain. I used to feel 9s across the board on the pain scale. I feel 4s and 5s now upon initial insertion, then if it gets too long or too fast I'm back up to 9. The past few years I've been single because I was too afraid that A) No one would want me as a partner after discovering my problem and B) that I would never be free of pain and always feel guilty for not being fun to have sex with.

Well, I'm still in pain, but I got a new partner (3 weeks ago! So New!). Now that I have him as motivation, I am regular with my hormone cream and I even tried acupuncture today. I have yet to test whether it was helpful for my PFD but it definitely made me relax. Some days I truly believe that I will never be free of the pain. I want it to go away completely, but I'm afraid it won't.

One good thing has come out of all this. I take better care of my body and exercise a lot more often. I'll keep you guys posted. This disease is extraordinarily sticky and my healing has been slow. Making slow progress is better than no progress, right? RIGHT?!

WEIRD (possibly incredibly stupid) QUESTION:
Has ANYONE on here improved their condition by having sex? It could act as physical therapy, where the partner is very slow and calm and then the pain eventually decreases. Let me know. Also, thanks to anyone who read this.

I actually found that abstaining from attempting to have sex for a year while I made progress with dilators was what worked for me. Initially we were persisting and despite good communication just making things worse and getting frustrated. We didn't try again until I was able to use the fourth dilator out of the five without pain and the last couple of months I've been able to have pain-free sex again (and I do mean pain-free not just bearable). I know that's probably not what you want to hear. I do understand what you mean by it acting as physical therapy, but with the best will in the world and the most considerate partner, it's not the same as practising with dilators.

You are absolutely correct that slow progress is better than no progress. I would just hate for you to undo any progress by attempting to have sex if your body is not cooperating because pain makes the pelvic floor muscles tighter and just exacerbates the situation. But we're all different. This condition is so variable, with different triggers, causes and symptoms. Ultimately you have to go with your gut instinct.

Whatever you decide I wish you all the best

I have abstained for over a year now, but ultimately I feel it is worth it in the long run as I'm just now getting to the stage where I'm considering it. I found when I did try and wasn't ready to it was painful afterwards and really didn't help. I might have felt reasonably ok during, but the pain after was awful. I think going with your gut instinct is always good though. Your body will guide you. I think the key is though, everything gently does it. Don't try and force anything when you're already in pain.

Hi minneapolis . So glad you have found someone new. Only have intercourse if you are feeling comfortable before hand. Use lubrication. Yes yes water based has suited me. You maybe uncomfortable for a while. Take some painkillers if you want. Keep up with the acupuncture. It relieves stress, that's why you felt calm. I think and this is only my theory that your vagina has to get used to being penetrated again. Hopefully each time will get better and easier. Also remember you can please each other in other ways. You don't have to be penetrated every time. Good luck and relax.