Tired of being tired.

There. I said it. My brain is in a mush of tangled emotions...stress, trying to stay positive. I feel burnt out.

Me too!

I hope theres a light at the end of this tunnel.

It's truly exhausting trying to remain positive isn't it? I'm in the middle of a flare up right now because I've done some decorating and it was too much for my wobbly pelvis so my pelvic floor has just clamped right up again. I was doing a bit better before that and hoped I was on the right path. Even my mind numbing medications aren't doing anything in any respect at the moment, except make me fat of course.

Hey Sarah

Yeah flare ups defintely are a downer, big time.

I hope you are doing better and can continue with decorating. Thats one of my favourite things to do.

Take care

Oh my god, I hate decorating!! I've finished the thankless task now, I'm actually sprucing up my house to sell it so I'm not even going to get to enjoy my efforts! It looks brilliant though and is making me even more sad to have to sell.

@ Noni I can so relate. Work is so stressful right now and Im having a flare up and family issues blah blah blah feel like I can just about cope. My anxiety is so high!

@ Sarah, have you found somewhere else to live yet? I do wish you peace soon with that situation.

To both, a song I love to listen too is 'This Too Shall Pass' by India Arie (she is singing about love being crap lol but the sentiment that all bad things pass helps me to know I'll get through these times)

Well Sebby, I've spent the last few months refusing to get the house valued until it's in the best shape it can be as it was my Mum's house I will not let it sell for peanuts but he hasn't helped me at all and swans off with his new girlfriend and leaves me to it. As I have joint problems I've continuously set off my pelvic joints (not to mention my shoulders too) which in turn has set off my V so I'm having flare ups on a weekly basis which is very hard work. I borrowed money from my brother to get the roof repaired as my ex with his big salary wouldn't contribute and as of the start of August he'll be moving out permanently with his new partner and taking all the kitchen appliances with him and leaving me to struggle to run a 4 bedroomed house on benefits which is a huge worry right now as it can't be done. The house I was thinking would be perfect for me and my boy that had been on the renting market for months has just gone so I've no idea where we'll end up now. It's all a massive stress that's just gone on and on and the new woman is being a total bitch about everything because she's jealous of me for some unknown reason so she's making sure she constantly makes life more difficult for me wherever possible. I don't mind admitting this year has so far been the worst of my life so far and I can't wait to be in a position where neither of them can have an impact on me anymore. The stress levels are just ridiculous.

When i need to recharge my batteries and im cried out and exhausted i listen to my fav chill out cd....hang on i'll find it online...

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Chilled-Euphoria-Various-Artists/dp/B00004TQO1/ref=sr_1_2?s=music&ie=UTF8&qid=1310334973&sr=1-2

works wonders xxxxxxxxxxxxx

Sometimes I catch myself wishing that I could disappear all the rest of my life so that I could have time to work exclusively on dealing with v. and then I think "oh my god, I'm so far gone down this rabbit hole". It's like have two full time jobs, or caring for two people - my normal life and my vulvodynia
But thinking like that just gives you total burn out, eh?
Definitely exhausting ...

@Sarah

Seriously your ex needs such a good damn kicking!! In the balls!!

I so hope and pray you soon find a lovely home and that you can get a decent sum of money from the sale of the house. I can't believe he is being such a barstad when he has basically pissed off with another women! She needs a good kicking aswell (in the vulvar!) sorry I'm having a hissy fit. I do wonder how some people go to sleep at night with the way they treat others

Deff try and chill out as much as possible. I know it isnt easy but this crappy time for you will end. Look to an independant future without that dumb ass.

Sending you prayers xx

I agree, about the kicks!! Thanks for your prayers, gratefully received and I'm counting down the days until he goes even though I'll struggle badly to keep the house even close to afloat. He's been vile to live with all year and has made my life hell, he shouts and swears and throws my things around until they break. I've moved some bits I had left from my Mum to my brother's house because I know they'd have got broken here to upset me. I even thought about getting an injunction on him after he threatened to push me through a window but just keep thinking he'll be gone soon. I can't believe what he's turned into, I don't even recognise him and thanks to all my medication I've actually been far too reasonable about the whole situation but the Ami in particular has taken any fight out of me! I can't wait for him to leave, roll on calm quiet days.