Advice needed please

Hi everyone,

I am very new to this i have never been on a forum before, so i don't really know what i'm doing or how to work it.

I have had Vulvodynia for about 2years, i have found it really difficult and i was hoping for some advice and some people who i can relate too.
My family and my boyfriend have been very supported throughout my vulvoynia although i find it very difficult to explain to them what i feel like, as they don't understand or cant relate to what i'm feeling.

I have managed to finally find medication which takes most of the pain away threw intercourse, which i am over the moon with! It took a while but we got there in the end. Although because of the trauma my sexual drive went to 0 and now even though the pain has got better my drive is very low and this is putting a strain on my relationship with my boyfriend who i have been with for 3 years. My boyfriend has been amazing threw my difficult time, but i find it really hard to express how i feel and its making it really hard for him, which i do not want.
At the beginning of our relationship i did not have vulvodynia and our sex life was out of this world! So it is really difficult for us both now i have no desire for it. My feelings for my boyfriend have not changed from the start if anything they have got much more stronger, he doesn't understand why i don't have any sex drive and i cant explain it to him very well as i dont understand fully my self or what to do about it. We are just stuck in one place and i don't want to loose him.

Can anyone relate to how i'm feeling?
Does anyone have any advise how to build my sexual drive up?

Any advice will be appreciated

Thank you for reading

April x

Hello April, What medication are you taking, including any others not used for Vulvodynia? Some medication and lower your sex drive. I am Bipolar and some Bipolar medication such as anti depressants can lower your sex drive. I went from a VERY healthy sex drive to a non existent one after starting anti depressants. Once I was taken off the med. my sex drive came back. So perhaps its because of one of the meds you are on. hugs

Hi, Thank you soooo much for replying i really appreciate it

I'm on Amitriptyline, The pill(Dianette) and Iron supplements.

If it is my Amitriptyline do you know what i could do about it, as i need to be on them to control my pain when i do have intercourse.

Thank you very much

April xx

Hello, I wasnt able to take amitriptyline because it caused awful dry mouth, so instead I use Amitriptyline ointment. The ointment numbs the area. I use it twice a day. Also before I have sex I will fill a plunger (the kind that you use when you have a YI) with KY jelly to make sure I have enough inside. Then I put a bunch on my hubby and also on the entire vulva area. I used to have painful sex because I was way too dry but now there is hardly ever any pain during sex. Also Im taking Lyrica which seems to help with the daily pain that I have.

So I hope that helps you a bit. Take care. hugs

Ok great thank you for the advise i will book an appointment to see my Dr. too see if she can change my meds and see if that improves my sex .

I purchased the 'Yes' lubricant which comes in little Disposable applicators and i find them very useful too, as my pain when having sex was sometimes due to dryness as well.
They are a bit pricey but worth it as other lubricants irritated my skin and gave me thrush, how ever i have no problems what so ever with 'Yes' as it is water based and is recommended to women who have vulvodynia. You will find this website if you just search 'yes lubricant' on Google


Thank you soo much for your help and advice i really have appreciated it

Take care

April xx