so depressed and need to vent

I am new to this board but i have been on it constantly since ive found it. There is so much information here to digest. I used to go the the vulvodynia website on the ic support website because i didnt know any other boards existed for this condition.

I am just so depressed and so tired of juggling all my illnesses. It seems everytime im feeling better for a while, i get knocked back down. im so tired of going from dr to dr looking for answers and help. I am definitely making an appt with dr goldstein as recommended by some other members on this site. this just adds to my depression as we are experiencing financial difficulties and he doesnt take insurance.

Back in oct, i became suicidal. the only thing that got me thru the night was going to a suicide prevention website. I know my children need me. especially my daughter she suffers from mental illness and i alwys need to be here for her. It just gets so hard. My marraige is on the rocks. I am so lonely its unbearable. then to have all this pain , i just sometimes dont want to go on living anymore.

Tomorrow i am calling a psychologist to make an appt i Know i need help. I just know its going to be the run around again. trying to find a good match. Hopefully the first one i see will. any way, thanks for listening. i just needed and outlet right now because i have no one talk to right now.

I'm sorry you are struggling, and I'm sorry nobody has replied until now. You posted a while ago -- did you ever make an appointment with a psychologist? How are you feeling now?

You poor hun. I hope your still on this board and you haven't given up on us. I havent been a member for very long and I didn't see this post until Carby replied to it. I understand how you feel about not wanting to go on living anymore. I have felt like that on many occasion. But Im so glad that Im still here. I have hope that there is a Dr. out there, some where, who can help me.

Hang in there honey and keep trying to find that one thing that will help you. Don't give up. hugs

thanks to both of you. iwas having a really bad day and really needed to vent. i have ibs, fibro, pelvic floor spasms, and vulvodynia. i found a therapist and have been seeing her for almost a month now. not sure if its helping, but im defiinitely not reaching for a bottle of pills and alcohol anymore. its still really hard. i appreciate the concern. sometimes i feel so alone with all my ailments. i hate juggling all my illnesses and having vulvodynia is the worst. not being able to function as a woman is so difficullt. i had made an appt with dr goldstein but had to cancel. i just cant afford it. so i went to see my old urologist whjo originally diagnosed me and he gave me some new creams, topicals and upped my nortriptlyine dose. just waiting for some results now. I havent been on the board since my original vent. i have just been too depressed. thanks for your support!

where are you located?

sorry it took so long to reply I had difficulty getting back on the website. The link was not working. Any way , I live in Long Island NY

Hope you're feeling better! I live in Florida was gonna offer My doc but I guess you're too far