Trying to understand:)

Hello everyone, I have so many questions which I'm trying to understand myself from my own experience but hopefully some of you guys can help me understand better:)

My pain started when my boyfriend and I were having dry sex. (I was still in my underwear) I remember the burning and knifelike pain but I couldn't make any sense. After that moment, I was never able to sit down. My pain was constant and I remember the burning being soooo severe. Later on, I was diagnosed with localized, provoked vulvodynia.

1) I would sit down and after that the pain wouldn't go away. It was like a cycle, it was provoked and it would hurt for hours and then I would sit again and so on and on. Can localized pain can hurt all the time right after the minute you sit down?

Later,

I had vestibulectomy but one part of the pain didn't go away. After 3 months I had and MR neurography done. (for the pudendal nerve) My pain has always been on the left side. And according to the report, my left pudendal nerve is thicker than the right one.
So after months, I figured my main burning was due to an abscess (bartholin gland) I had the bartholin gland removal surgery and now my pain isn't as bad as before. Which brings me to my second question,

2)Can a huge(size of a table tennis ball) bartholin abscess could have caused that report to turn out the way it was? Doctors told me that this report doesn't determine anything. It just shows that the pudendal nerve is problematic.

3) (I've never had sex, penetration, and that day with my ex I remember not wanting to) Can one stressful event cause pelvic muscles spasm and damage the pudendal nerve which can cause VVS?

But my burning had always been in my entire vestibule. After vestibulectomy, my doctor told me that I had way too many mast cells. Btw, I had no pudendal neuralgia symptoms other than pain with sitting. (I still can't sit very well but I'd like to believe its because of the recent bartholin surgery)

Now looking back, I'm trying to find what started all this. The burning pain started that day with my ex and it became worse each day until I wasn't able to even walk. But the first month it was more like a mild mild aching pain. Then it became so severe. Could I have tightened the pelvic floor muscles not wanting to go any further and damaged the nerves? What I don't understand is, I remember the left side being super super severe and the right side was way better than the left one.
I think I was born with too many nerve endings and triggered it that day. I still have burning but not constant. I think I have scar tissue on the right side too and it burns crazy.
I know how long this is, but I can't believe that one stressful event can damage the nerves.